Name changed for this.
My DH had what I would call an emotional affair. They became friends online, social media and then started texting. We live a long way from her, they couldn't have met up. She has a husband but DH would tell me they were not in love anymore. Lots of mentionitis from DH, "OW this, OW that". When I became suspicious I checked the messages and they were texting lots. Sometimes she was making snide comments about me but in a subtle way that would go over most bloke's heads. Keeping him onside, shoulder to cry on and he was badmouthing me a bit and telling her private things about me/us. I was so angry. It's like she was using him as an emotional crutch and DH was enjoying the attention.
When I found out what was going on and challenged DH he wasn't pleased and there was minimization/gaslighting but I told him it was an emotional affair and eventually, after some protestations from both he and OW about how they were friends/it was all innocent, contact was cut. Basically I told him cut her out or we're finished. And he did. First with the texting and then social media. He deleted her from Instagram about a year ago. She still follows him on it but never comments or likes his pics now. We have been working on our relationship and things are much better.
But the weird thing is shortly after he deleted her the OW suddenly started posting regular photos of her 'D'H on Instagram. She's been on that site for about 5 years and not once before this had she posted his photo. I know it's her husband and not someone new because she has posted his pic on FB before and tagged him in it. Her husband isn't on Instagram. You would have thought she was single looking at her Instagram pics before this. Previously she'd have lots of pics of herself posing (I reckon most of them were taken by the husband) but not a mention of him. It was all "I went here" along with a pic of her posing and grinning away wherever she was or "Here's my dinner" along with a pic of a single plate of food on her table. "Today I did X, it was fun!" and pic of her doing whatever. Now though there's all these photos of her DH and of the two of them together out and about, "Here's DH and me on our anniversary!", photos of them at Christmas, here's what we ate on X occasion, lots of usage of 'we' now in her captions rather than 'I' and so on. My thinking is that she's always taken photos of him/them together anyway, she's just not posted them on Instagram. I think it's very strange. What's her game I wonder. I don't for a second think she's doing this because she's all loved up with the husband now, it seems a calculated move. Also my DH used to tell me that she'd text him saying she was going out on dates with other men. Not sure if this really happened or she was trying to make him jealous. I'm just wondering why she's doing suddenly posting these photos...
I haven't said anything about this to my DH. He hadn't mentioned her since before the defriending last year, prior to that he'd said she'd emailed him once to ask how he was doing but he said that's when he last spoke to her. But when we were on holiday recently we got talking to a man who looked very like her DH (he's quite distinctive looking) and the next morning I mentioned this man to my DH, said he was a nice chatty guy etc and he responded with "He looks like OW's DH!" I didn't let on that I thought so too, I don't think my DH knows I've seen photos of her husband before. I just said "Oh really?" and he said "Yes. Oh and I haven't been speaking to her since that last time". And I said ok then and changed the subject.
And she keeps posting photos. I just find it, strange that she's posting all these photos now when she didn't post a single one before.
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Relationships
OW strange behavior
Firestarter19 · 11/01/2019 00:58
I think it’s stranger that your still checking her Instagram
Wow.. 
I'm afraid it's definitely not her acting strange it's you. You've become obsessed with her. As others have said she's getting way too much headspace. It's a bit stalkery. I don't think it sounds like your husband has had an affair. The term 'emotional affair' is a bit of a new 'vogue' phenomenon. I definitely would be royally peed off if my husband was using another woman as a confidante and vice versa and its not great behaviour in a marriage. But he did do as you say and cut her off and you're not doubting that so leave it be. If not you'll drove yourself crazy. Go out Roth your own husband and do lots of picture worthy stuff together maybe? I do sympathise because the temptation must be there to have a nosey but you've taken it to a new level and you need to get a grip on it now (in the nicest possible way)
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