This is just a rather depressed musing really.
I don't love my mother. I don't like her much either. She had untreated depression when I was growing up and was abusive-physically and emotionally. I tolerate her at best. I am 45.
I can't imagine what it is like to love your mother. I am closely involved with her, but this is mostly motivated by guilt and obligation.
I have two children, the eldest is nearly 9 and today when we were arguing (I would not buy him something) he said the most truly awful things to me.I realised that although I love my children desperately, completely and utterly, I do not actually expect them to love me back. Some of it is because I can't imagine anyone loving me but also I can't quite understand the idea of loving your mother.
I know my son knows I love him completely. I don't actually expect that back. I surround them in a bubble of love and concern and attention. I'm not expecting them to validate me in any way- but I wonder if it is even possible to be a mother who is genuinely loved by her children. Uncomplicated , non-guilt-based love.
I know that sounds rambling,but does any of it make sense?
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Do you think your children love you?Or,- do you love your mother?
Fengshui · 10/06/2018 14:45
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