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BF driving me mad, acting weird, think it's over :-(

(74 Posts)
Bushbaby66 Thu 26-Apr-18 05:58:57

I'm going mad and I don't know what to do.....

Not had any contact with my bf for 24hrs, no texts etc. Very out of character. He was chatting to me early yesterday morning (he wakes really early for work and I don't sleep much so we tend to start texting at ridiculous o clock ) and all seemed ok but then he suddenly disappeared off the radar. He's suffers from chronic anxiety and mild depression and is having a difficult time at the moment but he seemed ok in himself.

I was really busy during the day and suddenly realised it was gone 7pm and he hasn't texted me all day and had basically gone to bed without saying anything to me, again very out of character.

This morning no early morning texts, again really unusual.

At this point I'm a bit pissed. If I went a whole day with no communication he'd get upset so I've messaged him asking what's going on but now only have 1 tick on WhatsApp which means my message has sent but not been delivered to his phone, again this has never happened before. My first thought was has he blocked me but I can still see his profile picture and I can't understand why he'd do that.

We've been together nearly a year, he says he loves me etc. We see each other every weekend and keep in touch pretty much constantly so this behaviour has knocked me for six and now I'm over thinking everything and worrying. He was only reassuring me on Sunday about how much he loves me so I can't understand why he'd be behaving like this towards me.

Maybe he just doesn't want to talk to me or maybe he's struggling and needs help. I'm going to try phoning him in a bit but if I can't get through to him I don't know what I should do. I have his mother's number and I'm wondering if I should message her if I don't hear from him? Just so she can go and check on him. I'd go over there myself but I would have to take my youngest DS with me and I'm nervous to do that if my bf doesn't want to see me.

I'm going mad worrying and just feel sick with anxiety :-(

Monkeypuzzle32 Thu 26-Apr-18 06:03:16

Why didn't you just phone him? Messages are a sure fire way to miscommunication

Bushbaby66 Thu 26-Apr-18 06:13:15

I agree with you and we chat on the phone most days. I would've phoned him yesterday but got distracted and then suddenly realised the time. He's normally in bed by 6pm (gets up for work at 2am) and it had gone 7pm so I didn't want to risk waking him. Going to phone him in a minute. Just been waiting for a respectable time. He's only just gone back to work after months off sick and is only doing a few days a week but I have no idea if he's working today which is why I've been waiting to phone him this morning.

niceupthedance Thu 26-Apr-18 06:16:07

Broken his phone? Can you contact him via email or Facebook?

Skittlesandbeer Thu 26-Apr-18 06:19:54

I think I’d be more concerned for his health, or whether he might have had an accident.

If he hasn’t, I’d put this blip in communication down to him readjusting to his new working life.

DiamondsBestFriend Thu 26-Apr-18 06:24:27

Lost/broken phone?

Uggie Thu 26-Apr-18 06:25:40

Have you checked other methods of communication like email or messenger? My bf text daily. When one of us had had phone problems we've sent a quick email explaining.

It's only 24 hours so it isn't long really but I understand why you're worried.

Bushbaby66 Thu 26-Apr-18 06:28:01

I'm most concerned about his health to be honest with you. It's just so out of character. He's not on any social media. Think I can vaguely remember his email. Thing is I've never been in this situation before with him. I mean he has the off off day, we all do but it's really unusual not to hear from him and that my messages aren't going through. Actually it's the messages not going through that's worrying me most of all. He never turns his phone off.

Really want to phone him but worried I'll make him angry if I wake him. 6:30 is a bit early if he's not in work today.

Bushbaby66 Thu 26-Apr-18 06:29:57

If I can't get through to him I'm either going to have to go there on contact his mother. I'm leaning towards contacting his mum as he lives in a flat and, although I can access the building and his front door, I can't get into his actual flat.

DD2017 Thu 26-Apr-18 06:34:01

Get on the phone and check he's ok! Doesn't matter if you wake him up; he'll be glad you care.
Even the seemingly happiest people you know can be guising their depression/anxiety. Sounds like he's not in a great place... keep us posted... hope everything ok

Bushbaby66 Thu 26-Apr-18 06:40:02

Just phone and it went straight to voicemail :-(

Something isn't right..... He never turns his phone off.

Bushbaby66 Thu 26-Apr-18 06:41:32

Going to try phoning him again but this time hiding my number in case he has blocked me for some reason. Apparently if I hide my number the call will still go through even if theyve blocked you. I can't understand why he'd block me but I need to know one way or another

Bushbaby66 Thu 26-Apr-18 06:45:31

Still going straight through to voicemail even when I've hidden my number.

Have no idea what to do now.

Jael003 Thu 26-Apr-18 07:09:06

If you have his mum's number, please give her a call and tell her you're worried about him.

higherupper Thu 26-Apr-18 07:10:47

Could he have lost his phone?

NerrSnerr Thu 26-Apr-18 07:14:44

He’s probably just lost his phone or he dropped it in the bath. Could you have a stab at emailing or if you have his mum’s or a colleagues number text them (I wouldn’t text until after 8.30 or so though).

Bushbaby66 Thu 26-Apr-18 07:16:19

I don't think he'd have lost his phone. He keeps it with him constantly and he always has it charged. He runs his own business from home in his spare time and uses his phone all the time for this.

I have his mum's number and I'm going to phone her if I don't hear from him soon. Thing is we don't get on, we had a huge argument on Easter Sunday about my bf and his state of mind. He was due back at work but I knew he wasn't ready and was begging him to go back to the doctor before he tried going back to work and she had this huge go at me and said I was over reacting sad

Bushbaby66 Thu 26-Apr-18 07:17:49

Just remembered he has WhatsApp on his laptop too so lost/broken phone shouldn't stop him contacting me

memaymamo Thu 26-Apr-18 07:35:57

WhatsApp won't work on laptop if it's not signed in on the phone.

I'd be mad with worry too, but try to stay calm and remember the simplest scenario is usually correct (lost phone or having a super bad day and turned everything off).

Thinking of you and him.

Incarnationsofunderstanding Thu 26-Apr-18 07:39:37

Hiding your number wouldn't get around being blocked so try from another number.

It doesn't sound like he would have blocked you though so I'd be more concerned for his safety, go round or call his mum.

Bushbaby66 Thu 26-Apr-18 07:39:58

I'm getting angry now. If I did this to him he'd be really cross. He was only saying on Sunday that I can phone him and talk to him whenever I want to. I've never ever known him to turn his phone off.

Just found his uncle on Facebook. He lives near him. Think I'll message the uncle before his mum as I get on better with him.

Bushbaby66 Thu 26-Apr-18 07:40:45

I'm over an hour away and have to get DS1 to school first but I'll head over there afterwards.

Afterthestorm Thu 26-Apr-18 07:43:44

FYI my whatsapp was playing up last night with messages showing one tick and not being received for hours. My boyfriend s too. Hopefully he’s just had a bad day and will be back in touch today.

eddielizzard Thu 26-Apr-18 07:45:51

don't jump to conclusions. try phoning again before going over there.

Bushbaby66 Thu 26-Apr-18 07:47:59

I'll try phoning from a different number but don't have a landline so I'll have to borrow someone's phone. I've tried phoning from mine several times but it just goes straight to voicemail

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