Am I in love with someone else or will it pass?

[Horribleperson11]

Basically DP and I have been together a couple of years. This time last year we split for a short while and I went to stay at my mums as we were going through a difficult time. After about a month we got back together and I came back to our house and everything was fine.
This is the bad part now. I have feelings for somebody else who was introduced to me through DP. Have only met them a few times but after the recent meeting cannot get them out of my head. Feel like i can’t see them again because it’s hurting me and I feel fucking awful for my DP as I am feeling like this.
Will this feeling pass? Am I just doing a normal thing by having feelings for someone else? Or is it worse? I am half fantasising a life with them but they live overseas and nothing has happened at all and I don’t think it ever would. I want to be fully in love with my partner. He has been working long hours and we’ve had financial strain and other things have gone on that’s made us distant and I feel that I am compensating for the lack of “love” between us at the minute by developing feelings for the first person I meet and get along with. I know full well it would never happen but the thought of not seeing them again and also the thought of not being with my partner is seriously distressing me. I’m thinking about it constantly I feel sick I feel like a horrible selfish person (I know I am) and I’m beginning to wonder whether this has happened because me and DP arent meant to be. I have totally gone off the idea of children and marriage and feel like I shouldn’t be with him but he adores me and it hurts me to think of what we used to be like and we aren’t like that any more.

Has anyone got any advice? Should I leave and just be alone or try and make it work with DP and try and get our life back? Will this feeling about the other person pass?

[Addy2]

I think the other person is a red herring, so to speak. It sounds like your relationship is going through a rough patch, have you spoken to your DP about this and considered how best to fix it and whether you both want to? That's what I would do.

[Horribleperson11]

@Addy2 I don’t think DP actually realises anything is wrong - I want this to work and I want things to be like they were but now I’m confused because of the other person. Which I think is more of a symptom as i have never ever been interested in anyone else before. I think like you say the rough patch is causing this but I don’t know how to broach the subject without argument or upset

[nerofire63]

You are likely just going over a bumpy road. Things like this happen. Sometimes we are able to figure out what it is and fix it and other times, we have no idea. When you are with someone for so long (sometimes it is a few years or many years) people on the outside of your relationship seem more appealing. We all like how it feels to fall in love and get that rush. I think it is best to approach this when you decide. If you want it to work out 100%, then you sit down with DP and explain to him what is going on. If you know you don't want to work it out, then you need to find it in you to let both you and him be free.

[Cricrichan]

Shouldn't be this hard and you getting your head turned so early in the relationship. He might be nice and you might love him in a fashion but nowhere near enough to start a family and carry on the relationship.

[CountFosco]

You've only been together two years. Do you have children? If not end the relationship. You've not been together very long and should be very happy together still. But you've already broken up once. Sounds like it's not meant to be. There's no shame in walking away.

[WombOfOnesOwn]

Is the other person a woman, OP, and your partner a man? If there are issues of sexual orientation at play, this may go deeper than dissatisfaction with your partner.

[PrizeOik]

I agree with others that your head turning this early on, especially when you've already broken up once, means the relationship is unlikely to be a good fit for you.