Couldn’t think of a title, without it becoming long and complicated.
But been split up around 7/8 months, he cheated I ended things. Been a bit up and down with how we’ve got on, sorting contact with dd and all that. He’s wanted us to try again and other than a few wobbles I’ve been pretty adamant that I don’t.
Yesterday he collected dd and told me he’s seeing someone new, early days and he won’t be introducing to dd or anything but he wanted to tell me so I don’t hear from anyone else, we have a few mutual friends.
Thing is I’ve been wanting this for him, so he’d move on and we could get on with just being friends and I’m seeing someone else myself.
But since he told me I can’t help but think I’ve made a huge mistake and we should have tried again. I even searched her name on fb to see what she looks like and I’m really not one of those kind of people. (She’s very attractive though)
I’ve tried convincing myself I’m worried for dd and that he’ll lose interest in her, but honestly I think I’m a bit jealous that he’s actually moving on.
But what’s that about? Is it just a normal initial reaction or does it mean I really have made a mistake in ending things.
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Ex, seeing someone new!
Emboo19 · 10/03/2018 13:01
Oh Emboo it's just a knee jerk reaction. He has done nothing but mess you around and string you along using your dd as a way to get you worked up. Being friends and getting along is one thing but being back with him would be another kettle of fish.
As for the feelings about the new guy only you can work that one out but it doesn't have to be as a reaction to ex seeing someone just take time and be kind to yourself 
I had the same exact feelings as you, OP when my ex moved on. This is years and years ago now but I remember it so very well. I can't even remember her name now (it didn't work out but they were together for 3 years) but oh boy, did I FB stalk the poor woman when I heard her name.
I think it's just a mix of the final nail in the coffin/ reverse psychology (it's not what you really desire but your head is making you think that he's all that you want. It will pass, believe me!). I think too it's a 'reaction' to the reality that, when said and done, it is over. It really is.
It's a bereavement of a sort. And this phase will wash over you, a last wave of the grief you've probably not really acknowledged over the past few months (years possibly?). It's the end of the breakdown of your relationship. Isn't that a great thing? You and your ex are emerging from 'broken' to 'done'. That's good. It's really good. Now starts the real, long overdue healing. The moving on. The only way is up, OP! But let time take you upward when you've shaken off the last bits of dust. Grieve a bit, shake it off, move on.
I think it's a totally normal, your response! People. We're weird, unpredictable creatures. 
It will pass, and sooner than you think. Here's to strength and new beginnings, OP.
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
Emboo, I remember your threads and wanted to say, keep strong. You deserve better than your ex 
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.