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No True Friends

(4 Posts)
gem1n1 Mon 19-Feb-18 01:54:49

Hi everyone,

I feel like such a loner these days. Many of my friends over the past few years have had children and each time I have been over the moon for them, I am the sort of person who likes to be there for friends, makes effort and committed to my friendships however I’ve found since I’ve become pregnant no one really cares. I do not hear from anyone, I’m in my 30th week now and some haven’t contacted me since I broke the news I was pregnant and these girls are my so called best friends. It’s really getting me down! I feel so stubborn on the matter now that I am even trying to make a point of not contacting them to see if they notice and nothings changed. I just feel so lonely. Has anyone else experienced this?

UnrelentingFruitScoffer Mon 19-Feb-18 02:25:50

Just smile and say hello to everyone. You are turning into someone needy and desperate and that never works.

Be nice to yourself. Be nice to everyone else. Be cheerful but realistic about what other people can do for you. Chat to everyone you meet.

Do that and you will have plenty of friends in no time.

But being passive aggressive and brooding on why your friends “owe” you attention and are being bad people by not giving you attention is just never going to work.

Howlongtilldinner Mon 19-Feb-18 06:36:54

Useful post unrelentinghmm

OP is there an antenatal class you can attend? People make friends there sometimes. Do you have a partner?

Having a baby is very special isn’t it? It’s no wonder you feel lonely if no one is sharing this with you. If they have children though, they maybe very caught up in their lives.

Once you have your little one it will open doors to friendship.

101trees Mon 19-Feb-18 07:21:00

Actually having kids was how I met my current besties! And I love them dearly. Ime the friends you make when your children are v young / babies are invaluable. They share your struggles with newborns / lack of sleep / frustrations of toddlers etc because they are in the same boat.

I suspect you are just on the cusp of meeting a whole load of new people who you will have loads in common with and they will be vital to your sanity whilst you are home every day on mat leave.

Also, if your friends have upset you - just tell them what you need in a non-accusatory way. I.e I'm feeling like I need a bit of solidarity / show of love at the moment - can we have a baby shower.

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