Fiance and the babysitter!!! :(

SarahLou8419 · 2018-01-18 03:39:44

Okay so I can't sleep and have felt sick and had a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach since finding this out but basically I found out on Monday that something happened between my fiance and the babysitter in September 2016 when she was only 16!! This girl was in our house an awful lot (too much really) as she went a little obsessive and wanted to come around all the time and sometimes used to just turn up as her house backed on to ours so she could see when we were home. Anyway my oh is saying this is not a big deal, that he was very drunk and horny for me but that I had gone to bed so he told the babysitter she could 'touch him down there to see how hard he was'.. He admits that bit but is adamant that they didn't kiss whereas she is adamant that they did.. in our house might I add where me and his children were sleeping. I think what hurts the most is that they have kept it from me all this time and I only found out because her ex bf told me about it. I feel stupid that they were both in our house together alot afterwards and I was oblivious to it all. Even messaging each other promising not to tell me! That hurts! At the time this happened we were happy and afew weeks after we found out we were having another baby so finding this out now is killing me. My oh is also saying she was messaging him saying how much she liked him etc which makes me think why did he not tell me so she would obv not be allowed around anymore! My gut instinct is telling me I need to leave as my trust for him has totally gone now but he is saying why would I break up our family for 1 simple mistake (technically HE is the one breaking up our family).. little things like this have happened before too. People have told me stuff or accused him of things but I have never had proof and he has always denied it but this just makes me think it was all true! Plus I found out he has messaged and called the girl who he had an affair with and broke up his 1st marriage for. I can't be with somebody I don't trust and keep feeling this way when I hear that he has done or said something he shouldnt have. We have recently moved into a lovely big 4 bed house in a nice area and he keeps saying i will struggle on my own and will have to move somewhere rough where the kids can't play out to afford somewhere on my own but think he is just trying to make me feel guilty and stay. Sorry for the rant but please say I am doing the right thing by leaving him!!

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Hello folks- thanks as always for the reports. We've a couple of questions we'd like to ask the OP, and we're going to take this thread down in the mean time