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Dilemma on this weird Tinder situation

(483 Posts)
Tyrianstoe Sat 13-Jan-18 17:34:29

Had to nickname change as I'm a regular and to be fair I'm embarrassed. Split up with my ex 2 weeks ago (his fault, broke my trust) and in a fit of anger and suspicion set up a Tinder account on Thursday night to see if he's on there as that's where we met. Anyway, was swiping through and I saw this lovely looking guy who had a very funny profile that mentioned a very obscure band that I love so swiped guiltily right. Don't know why I feel bad because my ex is a lying arsehole, but I'm aware it's too soon. This guy messaged me! So I said 'I like that band loads, nobody has heard of them' and we swapped messages. Then I thought I'm being a bit of a dick here so I deleted my Tinder but said if he wanted to message me off there he could and gave him my number. Thinking he wouldn't.

He found me on WhatsApp. He was telling me about his little boy who is going for an assessment for a disability, I write the assessments as a job so he was asking me what to expect. Then, this is where it gets weird...he asks me where I come from. Told him. He's from the same town. Not too weird. So asks where I live now, I live in another town not far away. He moved to my town 5 days ago. This morning he mentioned he lived opposite an emergency services station. So do I. He told me the name of his street. My house looks onto that street! I can see his house from mine.

So I do t know whether this is just too bizarre and I stop messaging him but...I don't want to! He seems sound. He doesn't use any words on my banned list, is retraining to do a job I'd love to do, likes the same music, doesn't put xxx on anything, doesn't use lol and doesn't call me Hun/babe grin I'm mad aren't I? This has got big fat rebound all over it. But my interest is piqued. Slap me with a wet fish!

MyAimIsTrue Sat 13-Jan-18 17:36:00

Meet him!

MidnightVelvetthe7th Sat 13-Jan-18 17:38:29

Is he a bit too close if it all goes wrong? Would you meet him in the local shop etc

Its not too soon if you want to, go for it!

Tyrianstoe Sat 13-Jan-18 17:38:33

I don't think we will have a choice aim he can see me get out of my car from his house!

My ex was such a dick, I am wary of all men. So I won't be expecting anything but neighbours. How weird though?

ThisLittleKitty Sat 13-Jan-18 17:39:37

I thought tinder was meeting people in your local area?? Or am I wrong?

MrsKnightley Sat 13-Jan-18 17:40:10

You sure it is not your ex in disguise?

Slapbetcommissioner Sat 13-Jan-18 17:40:44

Go for it! Sounds great and it's not too soon!

Tyrianstoe Sat 13-Jan-18 17:41:39

We will definitely bump into each other. He went for a drink in my local the other day 😬

I said to him that if this is too weird we can just stop messaging and he said that would make it even weirder when we bump into each other. I am such a cynic. Stuff like this doesn't happen to me.

Polopolopolo Sat 13-Jan-18 17:42:18

Ooh yes meet him I would

CircleofWillis Sat 13-Jan-18 17:42:43

As a PP said are you sure it isn’t your ex?

Tyrianstoe Sat 13-Jan-18 17:43:17

It's definitely not my ex. I stalked his FB blush

I had my settings to 80km so there's local and there's local...

Tyrianstoe Sat 13-Jan-18 17:44:06

Plus, my ex doesn't have such good spelling and grammar grin

LittlestTruck Sat 13-Jan-18 17:46:19

Meet him

ThisLittleKitty Sat 13-Jan-18 17:48:39

That's one if the reasons I was saying to my sister I wouldn't use tinder as it's people in your local area. I don't think it's strange at all tbh. Loads of people who live next to each other must use it.

Ryder63 Sat 13-Jan-18 17:48:51

Oh FFS, OP! meet him!

Tyrianstoe Sat 13-Jan-18 17:49:53

I honestly thought you would all say you are being a dick, stop messaging him.

I got unresounding LTB on the threads about my ex. This positivity is nice wink

chatty1234 Sat 13-Jan-18 17:50:00

Go for it

WellThatsATurnipForTheBooks Sat 13-Jan-18 17:50:03

Why not be honest with him - explain that you're only very recently out of a relationship so probably are not ready for another one yet. However, tell him that he sounds lovely, you have a lot in common so meet up as friends.

If you really do hit it off you can rethink things then. If he's not relationship material then you've just made a friend in your neighborhood

Shakey15000 Sat 13-Jan-18 17:50:52

But isn't this all too much of a massive coincidence though? I'll admit I'm a million miles away from knowing what Online dating is about but that all sounds too weird and close to home for my liking.

Ryder63 Sat 13-Jan-18 17:51:50

Yep. What Turnip said.

loveablether Sat 13-Jan-18 17:52:03

Be very careful. My best friend has a rebound boyfriend after divorcing her arsehole ex.

She married himsmilesmile and he is lovely!

ATeardropExplodes Sat 13-Jan-18 17:53:26

But isn't this all too much of a massive coincidence though? I'll admit I'm a million miles away from knowing what Online dating is about but that all sounds too weird and close to home for my liking

I agree. Give it a few weeks and back off a little. Too weird.

Tyrianstoe Sat 13-Jan-18 17:53:36

I've already been honest with him about being recently single and he said exactly the same thing Turnip that it would be nice to have someone local to show him where the doctors is etc and at the least it's nice to have another parent to recommend stuff.

Tyrianstoe Sat 13-Jan-18 17:55:08

It is a very weird coincidence. It really is.

Angelf1sh Sat 13-Jan-18 17:55:09

Definitely go for a coffee. If you don’t hit it off, it’s no big deal so it won’t be weird.

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