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Is this normal, as in is it reasonable behaviour from husband?

(13 Posts)
Beelzebop Sun 03-Dec-17 20:30:00

I find it difficult to know what is what. If I ask for a cuddle I get"come and get one if you want. "or similar. No open arms, movement towards me. No welcoming tone. Is this common? Thanks.

7to25 Sun 03-Dec-17 20:32:19


Moanyoldcow Sun 03-Dec-17 20:34:22

Not for me but I expect it is for lots. If you don't like it have you talked about it? What does he say?

Mustardnowletsnotbesilly Sun 03-Dec-17 20:36:20

Yes, i only get i hug when i'm preparing food for him.

MadAboutYou Sun 03-Dec-17 20:37:31

Mine asks if I want to come for a cuddle. Maybe just tell him to come to you?

ZigZagandDustin Sun 03-Dec-17 20:38:56

Yep! Mine is not a cuddler! Weirdly my son is exactly the same despite me trying to cuddle him lots. My two DD's would cuddle all day long.

I think it's genetic🙂

zillionth Sun 03-Dec-17 20:52:40

Sounds a bit miserable ...

SmellySphinx Sun 03-Dec-17 21:06:49

Has he always been like this?

Josuk Sun 03-Dec-17 21:16:38

People are different about tactile interactions.
I am more like your H.
Wjen I hear - ‘you never hug me’ - I go a little 😳...
And I think - just like your H - if you want a hug - just come and hug me.

But I doubt this is the only things that bug you. There must be more?

Beelzebop Sun 03-Dec-17 23:47:16

If I've mentioned it he will say that I don't run over to him and hug him. But actually I do, or at least touch him, arm on shoulder etc. I always wondered if he was a bit controlling etc. If I know I am fairly reasonable to be a bit 🤔 then I can try and study it.

Thinkingofausername1 Mon 04-Dec-17 12:57:08

Yup. Same here too. Could go the whole evening and if I don't say are you coming to sit with me, he will either just be watching tv or on his phone. Social media has caused a lot issues for us over the years. I think it's his way of coping when he's down but I keep saying to get of it. It's not good for mental health!! Spend time with real people

Babyblues052 Mon 04-Dec-17 13:04:08

For me it sort of is. Sometimes I'll go up to him and cuddle him sometimes he will come up to me and cuddle. Sometimes I'll say I want a cuddle and he will say well come here then or come get one, just depends really. I've never thought anything of it.

I think my dp do is in your position when it comes to kissing. I'm not a kisser really so unless we are being affectionate ie cuddling and he comes in for a kiss ECT. Then he will say he wants a kiss. Again I haven't really giving it much thought. It works for us.

deepestdarkestperu Mon 04-Dec-17 13:10:51

Not for me - DP is very tactile and always offers hugs and kisses throughout the day.

My old relationship, however was exactly like this and utterly miserable.

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