Egg donation and my wobbles

[Losername]

Hi. I have 1DC conceived through IVF. After giving birth, my relationship with partner was more strained - I had little support with baby, household organisation, partner started working very long hours - he returns home at about 9pm each evening. When we do look after our DC together at weekends - we disagree quite a lot, DC tends to be more upset at weekends, DC appears more settled when it's either me - or my partner doing the childcare/parties etc. We both would love another child - we went on an egg donation waiting list, and I've just started my medication. A few months ago an ex contacted me. He is having a hard time in his relationship and has recently moved near to where I live. We are have fairly frequent contact with each other, discussing our problems and supporting each other. I feel this ex is providing with the emotional support that need which I need, I can talk with him and be open - and I feel happier. I haven't told my partner that I am in contact with him, and I'm questioning why I feel the need to hide this. I think he is reminding me of a carefree time, and I am having some what if?? type thoughts regarding him. I'm confused - this is my last opportunity to have a child, I do believe partner and I are good parents (although maybe better separately) - we can get on well together, I don't know whether we just have normal couple-y arguments?? I love my DC so much, and would love to love another child...