Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

All I did was ask him to help me move the bed...

(15 Posts)
KarolinaIna Fri 01-Dec-17 15:51:46

And he has walked out, citing that I am always 'having a go at him.
Then telling me I am selfish.
Bad mouthing me to DS (telling DS it's all my fault as I spend too much because want to go to visit elderly relatives in January...) who is crying and begging him not to leave.

He says I'm selfish because if I want to do something I do it... but isn't that what normal people do??!

Quartz2208 Fri 01-Dec-17 15:53:32

From what you have previously said let him leave and stay left

Shoxfordian Fri 01-Dec-17 15:54:18

There's clearly a lot of backstory to this

Your partner shouldn't be upsetting your child though

AttilaTheMeerkat Fri 01-Dec-17 15:55:19

Do not take this man back, he needs to stay gone from your son's as well as your life. He is no decent example of a role model to your son either.

MoosicalDaisy Fri 01-Dec-17 15:55:40

He's emotionally abusing the both of you. It sounds like you can't talk to him at all. Let him walk and don't invite him back in. It will be very hard for your poor DS but it's for the best.

KarolinaIna Fri 01-Dec-17 15:56:00

There's backstory aplenty:
Emotional abuse
Financial abuse
Gas lighting.

I'm sorry if you feel I haven't provided the full story, I haven't got the energy and it would be about 6000 words long.

yawning801 Fri 01-Dec-17 15:58:44

Please LTB - he's a wanker. I would start making plans to leave him, straight away. Can you pack a bag for tonight and take your DS (how old is he?) to a family member or friend for the night?

hollowtree Fri 01-Dec-17 15:59:06

You are better off alone of this is what your partner is doing to you. You can and will be ok without him. Your DS will be better off without him. You do not need to live this way, don't let him walk back into your life now. He will enjoy the begging and it will only fuel what he thinks is his right to abuse you.

You will be ok without him I promise. flowers

KarolinaIna Fri 01-Dec-17 15:59:11

The thing which REALLY upsets me is that I know I'm not selfish. I am always buying things for him and DS, if I see something I think 'oh so and so would like that, I'll get them a gift'
DP on the other hand thinks it's acceptable to get literally nothing for me for Christmas- it's not about the finances - doesn't have to cost a lot - but he never does anything thoughtful or kind.

AttilaTheMeerkat Fri 01-Dec-17 16:01:26

He is not also above projecting his own behaviours onto you either. HE is the one who is selfish in the extreme here, he is the one who thinks it is acceptable for you not to receive anything for Christmas.

Bad men like him are just that, bad. They do not change.

beesandknees Fri 01-Dec-17 16:04:38

It sounds like you are well rid of him then?

Let him walk out, let him stay out. Your DS and you don't need this shit in your lives x

Greatdomestic Fri 01-Dec-17 16:08:20

Hi op.

Stop trying to convince us he is unjustified in his views of you. We know that and you know that. He sounds like a complete tool. You deserve better.

GreenFingersWouldBeHandy Fri 01-Dec-17 16:25:32

I'd say fine, shut the door behind him and change the locks.

I understand your DS is upset, but this man sounds vile.

He is abusing you both. Pack his bags for him. Leave them outside.

DianaT1969 Fri 01-Dec-17 16:59:58

You listed the back story. The only mystery here is why you are with him? Can you elaborate on that?
You can post about what he does for Christmas and things he says to you. But what will that achieve?
I'd like to see your next post about your new life free of him.

ExploryRory Fri 01-Dec-17 17:08:10

Here’s your chance to say ‘off you fuck then! Byeee!’ Why do you even want the twat around? He sounds like a pain in the arse.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: