Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Bisexual boyfriend

(13 Posts)
Schmapples Mon 13-Nov-17 15:02:24

I've always known he's bisexual. Had relationships with men before he met me etc. We have a lovely sex life and I have no doubt he finds me very attractive. We're monogamous so to all intents and purposes his bisexuality has no effect on our life together except for the fact I know he sometimes fantasises about men during his, erm, private alone times. Which I'm fine with -- everyone has their private fantasies!

Is anyone else out there living happily with a bisexual partner? It's not something I really share with people -- my family don't know for example, nor do lots of our less-close friends. There were a few friends of his who were surprised when we got together as lots of people assumed he was "on the way to gay" hmm

I don't know if it's related necessarily but he is also very interested in gender equality and doesn't really have any hang-ups about his own masculinity.

So overall a positive experience, though I do wonder about our relationship being judged if lots of people knew he was bi. Would love to hear people's experiences of being in similar situations.

saltandvinegarcrisps1 Mon 13-Nov-17 15:56:44

My rational.mind says it doesn't matter bit i don't think I could for no reason other than I just wouldn't like it.

BulletFox Mon 13-Nov-17 16:05:31

You're happy together, which is what matters. I'd feel slightly uneasy seeing someone bisexual but perhaps that's just me being narrow minded.

scottishdiem Mon 13-Nov-17 16:10:51

Fantasies are fantasies. The would be boring if they had to be on a par with the vanilla in a relationship.

MattBerrysHair Mon 13-Nov-17 16:48:11

It sounds like you have a lovely, honest and secure relationship. I've been with bi men before and I find the self-acceptance and confidence in their sexual and gender identity really attractive. I don't view bi men as any less masculine than straight men at all. I've heard people say they'd be worried about dating a bi person because of the fear they'd cheat due to being unfulfilled by one gender alone, which I find ridiculous as bisexuality is not synonymous with promiscuity or deception.

anon97528996 Mon 13-Nov-17 16:48:53

Both DP and I are bisexual but he has far more ‘experience’ in that area - I know how you feel. I thought he was gay when I first knew him, mostly because he took the sofa the first time I brought him home!! I don’t spend much time thinking about women (or men, except him) so I assume he’s the same. The only time I’m uncomfortable is when’s I know he fancies someone, he has quite an obvious “tell” (twitchy leg), it just takes me by surprise sometimes when I realise he’s perving at a man not a woman.

TheCatsPaws Mon 13-Nov-17 16:51:10

I’m bisexual. It makes no difference, although DP mentions he enjoys it when we both talk about our taste in women grin

SerendipityFelix Mon 13-Nov-17 16:56:23

I’m bi in a monogamous straight relationship - it really is a non issue. What I fantasise about when I masturbate alone is no one else’s business, not even my partner’s! It has zero relevance to my relationship. I am not any more or less likely to be unfaithful because I’m bisexual.

Insomnibrat Mon 13-Nov-17 16:58:31

I think more women are in relationships with bisexual men than know about it.

BraveDancing Mon 13-Nov-17 21:31:37

I'm bi in a monogamous same-sex relationship. I have had women in the past not want to date me because I'm bi. I figure that means they weren't right for me. It doesn't really have to mean anything. I don't miss men because I've got my gorgeous wife and no one could compete with her, cock or not.

BulletFox Mon 13-Nov-17 21:38:16

Sweet smile

missevelina Tue 14-Nov-17 04:12:02

I'm a bisexual woman in a monogamous stright relationship. It has never been an issue for us.

I am very much in love with my boyfriend and not remotely interested in anyone else, male or female.

tygr Tue 14-Nov-17 04:56:20


He is no more or less likely to cheat than anyone else and it’s biphobic to think otherwise.

I’m bi and similarly have been on the receiving end of assumptions from lesbians about my ability to be monogamous.

When I’m in a relationship I’m in love and loyal to that person and wouldn’t want anyone else; funnily enough bisexual people are just like everyone else. angry

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: