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Back on the dating scene - Help

(11 Posts)
Startingoveragain26 Mon 06-Nov-17 11:07:25

About 15 months ago DH and I split up, I’ve been with him since I was 15, have never been with anyone else, and now I’ve met someone new.

He seems really nice, met him about 7 times, talk on the phone every day. Met him last night and I was cold, so he gave me his jacket, and I just happened to mention “oh your such a gentleman” to which he sighed and said “can I be honest with you, I don’t mean to offend, and I apologise in advance if I do, it’s not my intention, but I don’t want to be a gentleman all the time with you, right now I just want to take you home and have filthy dirty sex with you”
I was like right okay. I just laughed cos I was a bit embarrassed but at the same time, really happy that he said this cos I really fancy him. I just said I didn’t know what to say to that, I did go all shy, and he laughed, and then we just started talking again.

This morning he sent me a text saying I hope I didn’t offend you last night. I haven’t replied yet, but what I want to reply is “you didn’t and the feeling is mutual” because I feel the same way, but I’m worried it’s a bit forward and I might seem easy?

So I’m just looking for a bit of advice because as I said I’ve never been with anyone else. I’m in my late 30’s so I don’t want to seem easy or old fashioned....if that makes sense.

So can anyone give me any advice. I’m also worried that I might do things wrong in bed, because I’m so inexperienced.

Worriedrose Mon 06-Nov-17 12:18:58

Well say how you feel. Simple!!!
If you feel the same, great! If you don't, you could express that too.
DO NOT OVERTHINK THINGS!
and good luck

LoveforPGTipsMonkey Mon 06-Nov-17 12:25:51

if you are worried about being very direct, you could drop the 'feeling is mutual' but instead respond with 'I liked what you said!'.
Bear in mind that many men on dating sites are just after sex - it all depends what you want. If it's also mainly sex, than you can go all guns blazing, but if you are after ltr then maybe best to give it more - see if he escalates the 'dirty' talk too much.

LoveforPGTipsMonkey Mon 06-Nov-17 12:26:44

give it more TIME haha

TheFifthKey Mon 06-Nov-17 12:35:29

Have you not slept with him yet? Because after seven meetings I'd definitely know all about someone's dirty side! I don't think it makes you seem easy at all - you're grown adults aren't you?

GottadoitGottadoit Mon 06-Nov-17 12:40:07

To be honest if you've met him 7 times I would think it a bit odd not to have had sex yet. If someone didn't want to have sex with me by that point I would assume they had 'issues'.

GottadoitGottadoit Mon 06-Nov-17 12:41:32

There is no such thing as 'easy' so long as you're only having sex with people you fancy.

Nainer123 Mon 06-Nov-17 12:42:08

So exciting! I love treads like this! Did you think he was easy by saying that to you? No you didnt, shouldn't make a difference because you're female. I think you should just go for it and say how you feel.

Good luck 😃

Wherearemymarbles Mon 06-Nov-17 12:50:26

I doubt you’ll scare him off.
He is probably worried he over stepped the mark or that you’re no so interested so definitely text back and say the idea of un-gentlemanly behaviour sounds lovely.

LoveforPGTipsMonkey Mon 06-Nov-17 13:21:17

personally what I dislike with online dating, (mainly) men tend to judge when it's enough number of dates to start the sex talks and then when they deemed it's enough, start dropping persistent hints. It's a bit cringe - sort of 'time to put out or I'm off'. And he's a lot more patient than most, OP - and apologetic in case you 're not ready - sign that he probably genuinely likes you.

Startingoveragain26 Mon 06-Nov-17 20:55:41

Thank you everyone for replying. I didn’t meet him online, I met him when I was out with my friends, we got chatting and he asked for my number and I gave him it.

I did send him a reply saying he didn’t offend me, then after reading all your comments, I sent a txt message saying “what you said to me last night, I wasn’t offended because the feeling is mutual”. So will see what happens next.

Thank you for reassuring me that I wasn’t being easy lol.

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