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When you've had a one night stand, was oral sex (given and received) part of it?

(22 Posts)
pieceofpietuesday Mon 06-Nov-17 07:20:30

Just wondering if its usual to do that when its a one off!

Pinkpillows Mon 06-Nov-17 07:24:00

It happens alot of people do, but from a health point of view isn't wise. Why you ask?

pieceofpietuesday Mon 06-Nov-17 07:25:41

just wondered really, it happens everytime with my other half, and didnt know if it was part of sex in every instance even if a one off

Quartz2208 Mon 06-Nov-17 08:03:11

No it doesn't always have to be

Pinkpillows Mon 06-Nov-17 08:15:53

In a relationship if that's what you both like to do then yes it'll probably happen most times, if you feel uncomfortable with it you need to tell him. Some people hate it some don't mind some want to just leave it as that

HoofWankingSpangleCunt Mon 06-Nov-17 08:17:30

Do you like oral sex Op? And does it go both ways? If it doesn't why not? (Obvs you dont have to reply on here)

SandyY2K Mon 06-Nov-17 08:40:09

it happens everytime with my other half

Before you got together I assume?

IME... I received it on a ONS.

Bertsfriend Mon 06-Nov-17 08:51:51

I would only give oral sex to someone I was in love with, it's much more intimate than sex. So I definitely wouldn't on a ONS.

NotTheFordType Mon 06-Nov-17 08:56:27

If I picked a guy for a ONS and he said he didn't go down, I'd be extremely unimpressed.

RedForFilth Mon 06-Nov-17 09:07:05

It's different with everyone ime. Depends what the mood is and what you both like etc. For some people it's their favourite part! Fwb at the moment loves to give which is nice, other people prefer other things and ime most people have something they're best at!

backinthatdress Mon 06-Nov-17 09:13:20

For a one night stand I'd give oral and expect it back, if he wasn't going to give it that's fine! But I wouldn't give it then.
Although I have had a ons and gave oral and didn't get it back but it was with someone I knew and I'm pretty sure I made the motion after giving him oral to go straight to sex.

With a long term partner I give oral nearly everytime we have sex, and get it back, unless I'm feeling lazy lol

idontwanttodothisanymore Mon 06-Nov-17 18:54:19

I have only given oral to my 3 most serious relationships.

Never to ONS or short relationships.

I see it as more intimate.

MegFlyAway Mon 06-Nov-17 21:20:40

I wouldn't with a ONS - you don't know where it's been! shock

MiniTheMinx Tue 07-Nov-17 06:39:15

Well that sums it up "you don't know where it's been"

If that should cross my mind then "we" wouldn't be having any kind of sex.

I'd rather give oral than have PIV with someone I don't know. Oral seems less intimate to me. I feel less vulnerable doing something to someone than having something done to me. Plus it's probably something evo-psych about vulnerability to pregnancy, even with a condom, PIV makes me feel vulnerable.

TheNaze73 Tue 07-Nov-17 07:17:11


IrritatedUser1960 Tue 07-Nov-17 07:20:02

I wouldn't want to receive without a dental dam for an ONS (not that I have sex anymore) you have no idea what you could be catching from them.

TheStoic Tue 07-Nov-17 07:22:19

Never had a ONS. Out of interest, I’d like to know the orgasm stats from hetero ONS. I bet female orgasm lags well behind.

Isetan Tue 07-Nov-17 07:38:02

Isn’t it down to personal preference. If you’re happy with giving or receiving then do, if not, don’t. There isn’t a norm but from a sexual health point of view, I personally wouldn’t and wouldn’t be particularly impressed with a sexual partner who did (hence why getting tested with new partner’s is so bloody important).

However, I’d question the motives behind a partner volunteering information about their previous sexual exploits. Are they trying to convince me that somehow I was the ‘abnormal’ one for not giving or receiving with someone I barely knew? If so, I would question their maturity and intelligence.

Ellisandra Tue 07-Nov-17 07:41:59

That would be my hypothesis too TheStoic!
I've never set out to have a ONS, but I was always happy to have sex on a first date, so had a few two night stands that way.
I stopped having sex quickly in my late 30s (dating again after divorce) because although I really loved that first time rush and excitement, I generally found that the sex just wasn't that good confused Not a moral decision to stop. Just...
In my experience it's far easier for me to make a man come than vice versa - so it seemed like most often, they were getting more from the O/TNS than me. I didn't care about racking up say 20 new (safe sex) partners. I did care about having 20 bouts of really quite mediocre sex where I was putting in more effort!

As to the question - give, yes. Receive - rarely. But that's more about my likes than anything else.

Odd question really - surely it's obvious this one comes under "everyone is different, do what's right for you"?

MissWilmottsGhost Tue 07-Nov-17 07:50:27

Agree with stoic and ellisandra

IME sex on a ONS, while often exciting, is not generally good.

MiniTheMinx Tue 07-Nov-17 07:58:52

TheStoic I tried to have a ONS once, it was a disaster, turned into a year long relationship. I'm inclined to think that having ONS could be just having a lot of mediocre sex. Plus all the worry of STDs. Seems like a huge effort for no reward.

TheStoic Tue 07-Nov-17 08:12:14

Seems like a huge effort for no reward.

Exactly. It takes time for someone else to learn how to push my buttons. The chances of a man being able to do that on the first/only night would be nothing short of miraculous. grin

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