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Ex trying to make my life miserable

(15 Posts)
Owelette Sun 05-Nov-17 22:13:53

As stated really, we split up a few months ago and he’s taken it badly. He keeps trying to start arguments with me over every little thing and tries to manipulate me. We have kids together. He’s always been weird/narcissistic but he’s really doing my head in lately.

Most of the stuff he does now is via texts of which I don’t respond. Ok, I have responded when I’ve just wanted him to shut the F up, but mostly I ignore him. But given a chance he would do all this stuff to my face.

He’s really irritating to the point where today I told him to not message me unless it’s concerning the kids otherwise I will get a restraining order on him. Harsh but I had to put my foot down, I have had enough.

Not sure what I’m looking for really, I just need to get it off my chest. The way he is dealing with everything is unhealthy and yet he has always been this way which is why I don’t want him. He is mentally abusive and just comes across as a petulant school-yard bully. He makes me feel sick.

KramerVSKramer Sun 05-Nov-17 22:16:47

Log it. Keep it. Let him know you’re logging. If it continues for another week, escalate it to the police.

He’ll soon stop. Or think thrice.

Livedandlearned Sun 05-Nov-17 22:17:25

You are not alone. My ex has recently got worse in terms of trying to get to me. When he has a girlfriend I can relax but as soon as it all goes wrong for him I'm always in the firing line. He also seems to think I'd want him back hmm

Just try to be consistent and he might get bored of it. Show no emotions to him at all, take away his power.

Owelette Sun 05-Nov-17 22:52:33

I’m keeping all our texts/emails in case he tries anything. I am just fed up with it all.

Anyway if getting it to stop altogether? I’ve had a really nice weekend, the kids have been at his. He brought them back today and as soon as left mine BAM! he starts texting me. He immature at best. I’m at my wits end with him. I’m kind of hoping he does get a new girl then maybe he’ll piss off.

Livedandlearned Mon 06-Nov-17 07:07:01

You're just going to have to take a huge step back and ignore his texts unless they are about your dc and are important.

I don't know why they do it, it's all about feeling important I suppose, has wants to be the centre if your world in anyway he can't, good or bad. Definitely immature yes.

OnTheRise Mon 06-Nov-17 08:02:44

Tell him to only contact you by text, and then to only contact you regarding your children; and that if he continues harassing you by text you will involve the police. And then do it.

He's clearly not going to stop doing this unless you are very firm with him.

Ineedmorelemonpledge Mon 06-Nov-17 08:10:44

Are you speaking by text or Whatsapp?

When my ex did this I got into a routine...kept Whatsapp on when he had DS and then as soon as he was back I blocked him until I needed to speak to him about pick up plans.

You are doing the right thing by not reacting.

SandyY2K Mon 06-Nov-17 08:21:36

Tell him to correspond via email as his number will be blocked unless the children are with him for emergency purposes.

Hopefully what you said to him is enough.

Mum4Fergus Mon 06-Nov-17 08:53:43

I had similar...eventually blocked him on everything except email, and I only check that if/when DS is with him. Any communication that doesn’t concern DS gets filed, don’t acknowledge it or reply. He eventually got bored and gave up.

RandomMess Mon 06-Nov-17 08:57:18

Block him apart from when the DC are with him. Do not chat with him, email about DC only. Don’t let him in your home etc

He may well up the anti but the sooner you go grey rock on him the better!

Owelette Mon 06-Nov-17 21:42:35

I’ve blocked his number so he’s now resorting to email. It’s about money, typical with him.

In one email he says he’s angry and in a few later he says he’s not and he’s not interested in me.

So why won’t he leave me the feck alone then??? I’ve told my mum what he’s up to so she’s going to say something to him. He’s a joke!

Cakefortea1 Mon 06-Nov-17 21:50:52

I can sympathise, mine is now quibbling over £17.50 saying he is financially a mess since I left. Our last conversation was me agreeing to swap some dates so he could go on 2 city breaks and a weeks trip abroad with his live in girlfriend!!

Owelette Mon 06-Nov-17 21:57:47

@Cakefortea1 they come out with some sh!te don’t they. Maybe they just think their actions won’t have consequences like, you know, actually being dumped for complete twats. Then they play the whole ‘woe is me, you ruined my life’ card and wonder why we have no time for them hmm

I’m struggling to get bloody maintenance out of mine at the minute. The joke is he thinks £100 a month should cover it.

RandomMess Mon 06-Nov-17 22:12:09

Just go to CMS...

C0untDucku1a Mon 06-Nov-17 22:15:21

Dont engage

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