You guys may or may not remember me from about a week ago, asking if my husband was abusive. I have pulled up my pants, I've got appointments with women's aid and citizens advice.
But how do I get him to leave?!?! Yesterday he tried the "I'll do anything, I'll leave. I'll get medical help". I said OK, do it then. Prove it. Funny enough he hasn't!
It's a joint tenancy, I can't legally kick him out. I know I'll have to try going for an occupation order or settle it through court as divorce. But any tips on how to get him to want to go? Right now it's the only control he's got I think so he's sticking it out.
I don't want to set him off either but it's hell here! Help!
Well if he said he would go yesterday i'd give him a bit more time to be honest, its hard to find a place and move out in one day, especially a Sunday when the Estate AGents are ususally closed. And he can't get the medical help he said he would today either, because doctors aren't open on Sundays.
Why don't you tell him that the only hope for your relationship is if he leaves and gives you some space. Then when he's gone change the locks. I know he has a right to be there as it's a joint tenancy but if there is abuse then the Police will remove him if he comes round kicking off. I know this as my Domestic abuse counsellor advised me to do that.
He probably has no intention of leaving - so you need a plan b of terminating the lease and finding somewhere else But if you can convince him that his best chance of the two of you staying together is for him to move out, then he might go You may have to be blunt- he said he'd go yesterday, offer to help him pack?
Are you still within a fixed period tenancy or on a rolling tenancy? I’m assuming it’s an AST in England too so my advice is based on this assumption.
If it’s a rolling tenancy you could explain your position and ask the landlord if they would be prepared to take you as a sole tenant. If they would then you need to give written notice to your landlord of at least one complete month from when your last payment was to end the tenancy. EG if you pay on the 1st of each month and give notice today then (unless your landlord gives permission to end it sooner) your tenancy would end on last day of December.
If you pay on 7th of each month you could give written notice today and the tenancy would end 6th December.
Beware though to make sure your landlord is willing to start and new tenancy with just you as sole tenant. Many want as many people on the agreement as possible to make getting their rent more likely or may want a guarantor. Expect that it would require a brand new agreement including going through checkout with the inventory, refunding deposits and submitting a new deposit to go to the deposit scheme for the new tenancy, credit checks etc and may require fees to be paid to set up the new tenancy. It may not, but check with your landlord/agent just in case.
One person giving notice ends the tenancy even if the other isn’t in agreement and the landlord can then give notice to any joint tenants and evict if required. What happens really does depend on the attitude of your landlord/agent do it’s worth an informal chat to find out what might be possible before you do anything.