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Help, Helpety Help!

7 replies

EasyToEatTiger · 02/11/2017 19:30

Some years ago I posted on here about my husband's sexual behaviour and I was advised unequivicolly that he was sexually abusing me.
My daughter assaulted me in public and at home my husband condoned the attack with vitriol in front of me and both children.
A couple of weeks later I told him I wanted a divorce. He stonewalled me so I pushed his shoulder. He had me arrested and I was let go with a caution. Now the police are investigating him for coercive control.

I have made statements and am waiting to find out if the CPS will take things further.

At this point, I have been advised by a barrister friend to let it go as a court case will be hell.

I don't know what to think.

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MollyHopps · 02/11/2017 19:46

I can't believe you are calling this Barrister a friend!!!

Absolutely pursue this OP. If you can, gather evidence, previous evidence you have or equip yourself to gather evidence that could present itself.

Have you been offered any support, from the police or otherwise?

Oh, and this "friend"? Tell them when to stick their so called supportive friendship.

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EasyToEatTiger · 02/11/2017 20:35

Apparently I have been referred to MARAC. GP appt tomorrow. This friend is a close family friend and she has had her own experiences. I appreciate hers, but they are not neccessarily mine. At the moment I don't have an opinion.
I'm absolutely sure that if there is a criminal case against my husband she will support me. In the meantime she wants me to get the divorce over, as does my solicitor.

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EasyToEatTiger · 02/11/2017 20:49

My solicitor needs to know if there are potential criminal prosecution procedures against my husband. At the moment I don't know. All this seems to happen in secret.

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jeaux90 · 02/11/2017 21:00

Easy I wouldn't let it go but it's up to you. You sounds like you are in a really horrible situation.

Have you been reading lollipops threads? She's right in the thick of this shit too.

I walked from this because my abusive ex and i were living in the gulf at the time so I had no recourse, but I would have prosecuted his nasty ass if I could have.

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EasyToEatTiger · 02/11/2017 21:37

He hates me and wishes me harm. I don't feel the same way. I do not hate him and I wish him no harm. I see him as an abusive man and I fear him. I will work on the legal advice I am given. Please wish me luck!

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jeaux90 · 02/11/2017 21:54

It's ok. I don't hate my ex either. I feel nothing at all. I was very very scared of him and what he could do to me and my daughter. So do whatever it is you need to do to get him as far away from you and your children as you can.

If that means having to prosecute him and you have the strength to then do it. If there is enough evidence they will.

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EasyToEatTiger · 02/11/2017 22:56

My word against his. Hmm . The sheer hell of it. Although it will not be up to me, it is me who has brought it to the highlight. Because my husband had me arrested and it brought up concens.
I have asked him to make sure I am awake before he starts making sexual overtures often. It has been the subject of rows and I have always been in the wrong.

I would like to have my sex life back! I don't want to think of groping and fingernails. At best.

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