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Have you ever gone through a phase of finding all your friends irritating?

(13 Posts)
Gah81 Tue 31-Oct-17 17:39:44

I really don't know what is wrong with me. I have some good friendships which have always meant a lot to me.

Recently though, I seem to find so many of them irritating: from one person's growing competitiveness to another one's mood swings, or someone else's habit of disappearing entirely every time they hook up with someone.

I refuse to believe they are all suddenly irritating - and I am far from flawless (ha! Many many flaws!) - but why am I now so judgmental? After priding myself for my ability to stay discreetly quiet under trying social circumstances, why do I now find myself struggling to bite my tongue when (I think) my friends are being idiots?

It is clearly me. Have any of you gone through similar? IIs it a normal part of growing up and growing apart?

I tried reading about growing irritability online but got onto pages about depression. And I don't think I am depressed, pretty happy with my life atm (despite mum's recent health issues and a busy new job!).

Annelind Tue 31-Oct-17 18:02:32

We often outgrow friends as life changes. Of course you could always tell your friends when you think they are being idiots! thlgrin

Gah81 Tue 31-Oct-17 18:16:03

Hehe, that is an idea - but I just wouldn't know where to start in a way that wouldn't start an argument or didn't sound overly judgmental...!

bufin Tue 31-Oct-17 18:22:22

Any chance you're doing Sober October, my DD has become irritated with a fair few people in the last week.

Ttbb Tue 31-Oct-17 18:25:20

Yes, every month. It's call my period.

sonjadog Tue 31-Oct-17 18:28:18

Yes, I feel like this sometimes. It's usually because I am stressed.

sunflowersandroses Tue 31-Oct-17 18:36:33

Yes yes and yes. I can relate very much to this. Also believe we must be at the stage where we are growing apart. It's sad.

sunflowersandroses Tue 31-Oct-17 18:37:25

However, must add, I don't feel that the friendships need to end (in my case), just that I need to expand my friendship group and meet some different kinds of people.

Gah81 Tue 31-Oct-17 18:40:13

Definitely not Sober Octobering. Though my period is near...but have been feeling this way fairly consistently for the last few months.

I have some nice new friends but I still feel nostalgia about the old ones!

Thethrillofit Tue 31-Oct-17 18:40:30

Yes I do that and feel like I want to find a whole new set of friends more like me.

ouchthathurtsabit Tue 31-Oct-17 18:40:51

I feel this too and come to the same conclusion as you, that it’s me! But they’re still irritating!

I don’t think people have to be perfect. We love our fiends despite their irritations.

cushioncovers Tue 31-Oct-17 18:52:18

Sometimes we grow and change and realise that certain people/things just aren’t right for us anymore. This happens in marriages, jobs and friends. I have moved on from a few people over the years usually after I have had a big event/upset/change in my life.

HipsterAssassin Tue 31-Oct-17 19:59:23

Yep, definitely found this. I think it's part of maturing but can feel an odd mix of nostalgia and guilt as well as 'oh FFS'.

Been invited by really really old longtime ex bestie (of 26 years) to an event, felt really bad about not really wanting to go (we grew apart about 2 years ago while I moved from the emotions surrounding my ExH and therefore on from her - she was very unhealthily wrapped up in it) now I can't make it due to work commitments and I'm actually very relieved. It shows how we can really move on. And that's a good thing. Letting go is good. Life is change. My new motto!

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