Something is wrong with DH - not sure what yet but MS is on the cards, as are other autoimmune disorders and various other nasty things. This isn’t really about the medical stuff as I think that’s in hand but more how I’m reacting, which is shit. I’m literally falling apart. I can hardly bear to speak to him half the time. We have two DSs, 3 and 3 months, and I’m finding them very hard work. His mum and dad are understandably also worried and his dad in particular wants to be round to help a lot but actually he doesn’t help, and I find it exhausting and stressful and keep begging DH not to have him round. The flat is a tip because I can’t keep on top of things, and because we were supposed to be moving so I haven’t been bothered to get things sorted the way we’d like them. DH is a police officer and was due to transfer to another force, so we could be further from London and afford a bigger house and a garden for the DCs, but they won’t take him now with this going on. So we’ve pulled out of our chain and pissed everyone off. I’m already on antidepressants from having PND after DS1 - was tapering off when I became pregnant with DS2 and just kept on them. Haven’t had PND this time but now almost feel circumstantially depressed, but I don’t want to up the dose again. I feel so awful for DH, but I can’t being myself to be cheery and positive with him. I’m expending all my energy on being normal for DS1 and being attached to DS2. I just desperately want some space - DH has been off work now for 6 weeks and we’re cooped up together as I’m on maternity leave. He can’t even go anywhere himself as he can’t drive. He does his best but exhausts himself doing pointless stuff and then is too tired to do things with me and the DC. I feel so awful for feeling like this and acting like a dick when he needs help and support. I don’t know what to do. Sorry this is all so disjointed.
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My husband is ill and I’m being a dick - help
13 replies
AveAtqueVale · 31/10/2017 14:02
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