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Pushing my boyfriend

(14 Posts)
QueenOfUniverse Sun 29-Oct-17 19:00:33

I think I’m pushing my boyfriend too much by not trusting him...
I love him a lot
But he is always so busy... and I get so weird with him sometimes... I openly accuse him of cheating on me and being busy with other women
When the reality is I have proofs that he is always with his male friends and all of his circle knows we are dating... he is so busy with work and friends that he gives me no time
But my stupid brain keeps doubting him
How do I stop !??!? Help

Aquamarine1029 Sun 29-Oct-17 19:04:47

Only you have control over your behaviour, but you had best get a hold of yourself and quickly. If I were your boyfriend, I wouldn't put up with that shit for one minute. You either trust him or you don't. If you don't, then leave him and let him find someone who does.

QueenOfUniverse Sun 29-Oct-17 19:06:15

@Aquamarine1029 infact to make me feel better he is introducing me to his family and wants to meet my family so as to fix wedding dates

Aminuts23 Sun 29-Oct-17 19:10:26

Wedding dates??? You can’t marry someone you don’t trust. If I was him I’d be running for the hills. Sounds like a nightmare for him. Sorry I don’t mean to sound harsh but this is not healthy at all

blanklook Sun 29-Oct-17 19:32:01

Finish the relationship now. You do not trust him. You will make both of your lives hell and it will end because of your trust issues.

Walk away, now.

dinnerladies Sun 29-Oct-17 23:43:30

Is there a reason you don’t trust him? Has he done something in the past to make you think that? Or has something happened in your past, perhaps a previous relationship, which is now making you feel this way?

I also wouldn’t rush to marry someone I couldn’t trust. It’s horrible to feel like you don’t trust someone, the arguments and insecurities will ruin your relationship before anything else.

Josuk Sun 29-Oct-17 23:52:03

OP - may I ask how old you both are? And how long you’ve been together?

You both sound way, way too young to be fixing wedding dates.
And - the idea that this is being done to fix your insecurity issues - is just mad.
Marriage wont make you trust him more. He’ll still go to work and spend time with friends, not just you.

You need to figure out if this is something in him, specifically, that makes him non-trustworthy - or whether it’s some of your own issues.
(My bet is on the latter)
Once you figure that out - you can work on changing it.
Either leaving him, or working on yourself.

HeddaGarbled Sun 29-Oct-17 23:58:37

How long have you been together and how much time does he spend with his friends instead of you?

AnneLovesGilbert Mon 30-Oct-17 00:06:49

You say you "accuse" him, as in it happens often. Why? You've also said you know he's with his friends and not playing away so why are you sabotaging your relationship and giving your partner a hard time? Accusing someone of this repeatedly is really wrong and very controlling.

How do you stop? Just stop. Trust him and leave him he or end the relationship and let him find a partner who won't harass him.

Please dear god don't get married. That's an awful idea. Why on earth would you do that? You're already miserable and I can't imagine how shitty he feels.

QueenOfUniverse Mon 30-Oct-17 03:38:16

@Aminuts23 yeah I knw I agree idk how to get over this sick behaviour of mine

QueenOfUniverse Mon 30-Oct-17 03:39:15

@dinnerladies yeah my previous boyfriends have cheated me quiet a lot and my past relationships have not been so happy ....

QueenOfUniverse Mon 30-Oct-17 03:40:02

@Josuk yeah... we need to fix this

QueenOfUniverse Mon 30-Oct-17 03:41:44

@HeddaGarbled he is 12 hrs busy with work and whatever free time he has his friends take him out or jus go at his place and hang out ... he does call or text me once in a while abt how much he misses me and how fed up he is with his routine ... he says he understands the whole situation of not giving me time and wants to fix it

QueenOfUniverse Mon 30-Oct-17 03:42:26

@AnneLovesGilbert yeah 🙁 I really need to fix myself first

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