What would you take it to mean if someone you had been seeing for a couple of months said that they think you are amazing and you are definitely in a committed relationship but they are 'taking it slow emotionally'? I am not at the stage of making (or expecting) any grand declarations myself, but I am developing strong feelings and am now worried that it's going to be one-sided. I'm asking for advice/clarification as I don't really get the 'emotionally slow' thing; I either feel it or I don't, and usually quickly, but i realise that's me and not everyone is the same. So I guess I just want to know that if someone says this a couple of months in it doesn't necessarily mean that the whole enterprise is doomed?!
To give a some context and avoid drip feeding... Met online, clicked online and also in real life - amazing chemistry, very compatible, values and outlook in line, all good on that score. Two hours distance involved but talk every day and seen each other consistently every 10 days or so since mid-August for either one or two days/overnights each time. He's late 30s with a young DC, I'm mid-30s, no DC.
His last relationship with the mother of his DC was a bit of a mess. She was EA, I don't want to give too much detail but it really wasn't good, although they now co-parent amicably for the most part. They stopped living under the same roof a year ago. He is, in his own words, very bruised by the whole experience (I can't give the whole story but he really had a horrendous time of it and it has had serious ongoing effects on his career) and this is the cause of the 'taking it slow emotionally' thing now. He's been through an emotional wringer and after DC, ex-relationship and work stress there's 'not been a lot left'.
Plus points, he is affectionate, consistent, honest, always proactive and keen to see me, great at keeping in contact, says he thinks I'm terrific, kind, funny, smart, beautiful etc. and that he wants to be in a relationship and have more DC etc... but emotionally he is holding back at the moment. I have not said anything heavy to him regarding my feelings at all but they are definitely there and growing and I guess I just want to know if I'm wasting my time here. He says I'm not but it's just quite alien to me in terms of how my emotions work so some insight from anyone who has experienced the same (from either side) would be really helpful.
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Relationships
How would you interpret this?
Susurro · 27/10/2017 23:47
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