Skip to main content
Skip to main navigation
Skip to talk navigation

Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Flip

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

1 2 3

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Message from abusive ex

51 replies

MozzchopsThirty · 26/10/2017 22:36

What does this message say to you???
It’s been a few days now of him asking to make it work, he can change, give him a chance
After noting for 3 months.

Give me your opinion on the underlying tone of this

Message from abusive ex

OP posts:

Report

MozzchopsThirty · 26/10/2017 22:38

Sorry this was first

Message from abusive ex

OP posts:

Gingernaut · 26/10/2017 22:39

It's sunk in that no one is swallowing his bullshit like you did and he wants things back to the way they were.

I like the 'misreading' texts thing.

Like he's so not going to gaslight you if you meet up.

(Bring a witness to any meeting, or at least record what goes down)

TheEmpressWears · 26/10/2017 22:41

If he is wrecking your head just say
"This isnt good for me so I will avoid contact with you".

Dont reply to his inevitable reply!

LittleBirdBlues · 26/10/2017 22:41

It's impossible to tell without knowing the back story.

What's your gut instinct?

MrsTerryPratchett · 26/10/2017 22:43

He gives with one hand and takes away with the other. It sounds like he's taking responsibility while actually trying to blame you. He's good, I'll give him that. You're not actually considering meeting him, are you? Because this horseshit is him at his best, I'll assume.

butterfly56 · 26/10/2017 22:53

He didn't text you first because he didn't want you to get one over on him?! Says it all really.
Your gut is telling you that there is absolutely nothing in these messages that tells you he is in any way sincere.
He wanting to mess with your head but I think you already know that.

Eminado · 26/10/2017 22:55

Time to block.

Anniegetyourgun · 26/10/2017 22:57

OK, it reads about as sincere as... an insincere thing, but does it matter whether he means it anyway? If you don't want to meet him you don't have to!

notquitegrownup2 · 26/10/2017 23:02

Underlying tone? It wasn't all my fault, you know. If we meet up I hope you won't keep dragging the past up because it wasn't all my fault. You are missing out on a lot, you know. You should be happy that I want to give us another chance. I would be happy to tell you how you can make me happy, as long as you never bring up the past, or expect me to apologise, or have any expectations of me . . . .

That's what I hear there, anyway.

RumAppleGinger · 26/10/2017 23:08

You've saved him in your contacts as Twat. . His text reads like he is living up to name.

randomuntrainedcuntowner · 26/10/2017 23:21

He sounds like s nasty controlling twat to me.

Goosegrass · 26/10/2017 23:44

He’s a twat. Block and move on.

bastardkitty · 26/10/2017 23:47

It sounds to me like things aren't going as well for him as he expected. What's with 'if you don't want us to get back together, block me'? Drama? How do you feel about it?

Queenofthedrivensnow · 26/10/2017 23:55

Is he my ex the dentist?

MozzchopsThirty · 27/10/2017 07:30

Thank you all, you’ve just confirmed everything I thought.

The last 2 years of our relationship was like this, him behaving appallingly then luring me back in in this way with ‘sorry not sorry’ messages.

I also believe he’s realises what he’s lost, he said he’d been on 2 dates ‘but then I realised I wasn’t ready because I can’t get over you’
More like they were a lot more savvy than me and ran for the hills after one date.

OP posts:

MozzchopsThirty · 27/10/2017 07:31

I’m not going to meet him, not even to have my say.

OP posts:

thegirlupnorth · 27/10/2017 07:35

Your name on your phone for him is enough of a reason not to meet him, move on, block and ignore X

CaoNiMwahaha · 27/10/2017 07:38

He sounds like a right knobber, TBH.

monkeywithacowface · 27/10/2017 07:43

What an idiot he sounds. It all sounds very much "I made mistakes but not that many and everyone makes mistakes i.e I don't think I really did anything wrong. I messed up but it's just as much your fault. I want to talk about it but you aren't allowed to tell me all the things I did wrong. It's ok to be an arsehole as long as there some good things to remember too"

So all in all he's feeling sorry for himself but not what he has done

QuiteLikely5 · 27/10/2017 07:50

Was he abusive op

Stormwhale · 27/10/2017 07:52

He sounds utterly self absorbed. He's trying to worm his way back in, but it's clear that nothing has changed. He's a knob.

GracielaSabrocita · 27/10/2017 07:57

Never get involved with a man who uses the phrase 'going forward'.

CandleLit · 27/10/2017 08:00

It reads like a "poor me" rant. I'm a big fan of not responding to stuff like this - soooo much better than having the last word! If I've caved and replied, I pray that they text again so I can leave them hanging 😈

MozzchopsThirty · 27/10/2017 08:00

Yes he was abusive sexually and emotionally

OP posts:

CandleLit · 27/10/2017 08:00

It reads like a "poor me" rant. I'm a big fan of not responding to stuff like this - soooo much better than having the last word! If I've caved and replied, I pray that they text again so I can leave them hanging 😈

Flip

1 2 3

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.