What would you call this

[NK1cf53daaX127805d4fd5]

Just got on the train with OH. I took a seat and left a seat opposite from me for him. All the while smiling he mutters under his breath about my seat choice and how I should have left closest seat for him. I just got up and moved to a different seat. He literally picks at me for no reason. So sick of it.

[Qvar]

I would call it a shit relationship I was better off out of, what do you call it?

[NotTheFordType]

"Cuntiness"

[TheNaze73]

He sounds like a bell end

[bastardkitty]

All of the above.

[UnicornSparkles1]

I'd call that your OH behaving like a prick.

[RoderickRules]

I might start sitting with my back to him...

[NK1cf53daaX127805d4fd5]

I would agree. He has no problem picking at me or the kids but lovely to everyone else. We were in a playground the other say and a man was kicking a dog. I told the man to stop. He went over to the other part of the playground and continued doing this.

I went back over and called the man out on it. Told him he was a disgrace etc. This is very unlike me and I wouldn't even class myself as a particular animal lover but the poor dog. OH just stood there and said nothing. Didn't back me up. Now he's a self confessed animal lover. But always worried what people think of him. So sick of it.

[bastardkitty]

My ex was like this. Absolutely horrible, passive-aggressive and shitty, except when there was an audience. Also wouldn't say boo to a goose, even to protect his own children. There is literally nothing I miss about him.

[NK1cf53daaX127805d4fd5]

He's so worried about what others think that he'd never stand up for us. Yet tries to bully/pick on me all the time. I'm so upset going into work now. I despise him and can't wait to leave.

[RoderickRules]

Take s deep breath OP.
And mentally turn your back to him, and get in with your day.

[Sadlady77]

@RoderickRules - thanks. Am doing just that

[lollipop7]

Ugh he sounds like a major twat.

Couldn’t be doing with it. Mind you given last brush with relationship death I’ve been put off for life. Not even Travis Fimmel could persuade me. (Signs and thinks fat chance)

[NK1cf53daaX127805d4fd5]

He still can't see what he did was wrong. I'm so sick of him continually picking at me

[SandyY2K]

you deserve better. Start making plans to leave.

[MyBrilliantDisguise]

What's your situation? Do you live together? Have children?

[whatsavings]

Over.

He's only your OH - get rid before he becomes your DH & it all becomes a hell of a lot harder.

[NK1cf53daaX127805d4fd5]

Unfortunately we are married and we have 2 kids. This morning we were coming out of our estate and a car broke down in front of. Naturally there was some confusion and as he was trying to reverse the car behind was trying to go forward. He rolled down the window and started cursing at a neighbour in front of the kids. When I called him up on it he started roaring at me saying I'm always picking on him.

We dropped the kids off and I said he wasn't a good role model cursing at the neighbour in front of the kids or even at all. He started shouting again calling me a cunt. Now we are on different parts of the train and he is texting me nonstop about what a horrible person I am.

I am so tempted to tell him to stick it but I've so many practical things I need to do before I can leave.

[Clutterbugsmum]

Time to start the process of getting you and the DC away from him as soon as you can.

[Hermonie2016]

Do you have to travel to work together?

He is a bully and has to be right.When did his behaviour start?

I would recommend the Verbally Abusive relationship, it will help you understand the dynamic.Its soul destroying to live like this.

[AlternativeTentacle]

he is texting me nonstop about what a horrible person I am

If you are that horrible, perhaps he should leave and go find someone better?

[NK1cf53daaX127805d4fd5]

@Hermonie2016 - is that a book? I'll look it up and get it thanks. He's always been like this but it's like I'm only beginning to wake up to it.

I ran into an ex about 2 months. OH was with me so all above board but was in his company for the night and it was like it triggered for me what a normal relationship was like (we broke up years ago over something trivial). Ever since then I'm becoming more and more aware of how toxic his behaviour is.

[Sadlady77]

@AlternativeTentacle - I really wish he would go and find someone else and leave me and the DC's in peace

[Hermonie2016]

Yes, sorry, should have said, it's a book by Patricia Evans.

It helped me to recognise the tactics and once you see the abuse it's hard to "unsee".

[Frith1975]

Keep those horrible texts, OP. :-(

Sorry to hear you are going through this.

[GreenFingersWouldBeHandy]

NK1, I think you've hit the nail on the head. He is toxic.

Get your ducks in a row and make your plans to leave. You deserve much better than this. Hope it all works out.