Earlier this evening I received a message from my nephew telling me 'dad' had a cardiac arrest, was given cpr for 18 minutes and is now on a ventilator in hospital. Tomorrow the ventilator will be removed. My brother has a 'do not resuscitate ' request. My brother had an accident about 7 years ago that left him paralyzed from the chest down and needing round the clock special care. I moved to Europe 8 years ago under dreadful circumstances. I was drinking to cope, my partner was trying to take my daughters away from me so I ended up going with them (a very long story for another day) although it is a lonely life, I don't speak the language but I have been able to be with my daughters, become a pretty good mum and haven't had a drink for about 6 years now. My partner does still have a drink problem. Tomorrow is my daughters 15th birthday, my partner is away on a business trip tomorrow morning so I brought the birthday celebrations forward a day so we could spend it together as a family.
It's 2.30am, NO I am not drinking I just don't know what to do. I love my brother very much, he knows this. Should I book a flight and go to him tomorrow? This means I will be away for my daughters official birthday, it will also mean my partner cancelling/delaying his trip that is important to his job. we have no one here to care for my daughters for a couple of days if I go. The practical part of me is already accepting that I have already lost my brother, 18 minutes is a long time for cardiac arrest and with a DNR wish ! but my heart is telling me to go and be with him when they take the ventilator out regardless of what the outcome will be.
I feel very lost and really need someone to talk to for advice. What should I do
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Should I go and be with my brother
28 replies
letmeeatcakes · 22/10/2017 01:54
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