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The 'spark'

(5 Posts)
MrsOpinionated Sun 15-Oct-17 19:31:32

Is it possible for a long term relationship to lose the spark due to day to day routine and not having enough time?

What tips do you recommend to regain the spark?

marciagetscreamed Sun 15-Oct-17 19:34:43

The safe answer is -

Get some time to yourselves/babysitter and go out once a week.

Otherwise, you have to ask the question why the spark has gone... do you feel under appreciated or like a bit of servant at home? Do you have kids?

MrsOpinionated Sun 15-Oct-17 19:39:38

Dh is great, a really lovely man who would do anything for us. When we met, for years everyday I would think I was so lucky to have met such an amazing guy.

We have 2 children together and the last few months I have noticed how we don't seem to have much of a connection anymore :-( He doesn't really compliment me anymore or make me feel special.

I developed a crush last month which made me feel alive - the other guy has no idea I fancy him.

I guess it has just made me wonder if it's possible to get the spark back as I love him lots and would never ever cheat.

MiracleCure Sun 15-Oct-17 19:41:08

Having lived the life a bit, I'm afraid I think the spark = passion which wanes quickly. If you choose a partner to have kids with, the spark goes pretty quickly by definition! Better to choose many sparks!

Bant Sun 15-Oct-17 22:22:36

I think the original spark will go over time, especially with kids and work pressures. But if you had a decent spark to begin with, then if you concentrate on getting time to just the two of you, with no talk about those things, then it can rekindle it a bit.

So you can do date nights, and holidays alone, just as a couple, not as parents. Enjoy each other's company and then when you get back to 'real' life, then it stays for a while, and then you have your next date night etc etc

If there was no real spark to begin with then there's nothing to recapture, and it's just business as usual until one of you breaks and walks away or has an affair or something. But it sounds like you had that spark to begin with, so with a bit of nurturing I'd say it's possible to keep it going

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