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custody

(261 Posts)
marinemike Thu 12-Oct-17 16:11:33

i just want a simple answer,Can my ex stop me seeing my child?

category12 Thu 12-Oct-17 16:15:10

Depends

marinemike Thu 12-Oct-17 16:17:05

depends on what?

Sistersofmercy101 Thu 12-Oct-17 16:19:10

Depends on WHY.
Depends on whether DC is endangered short term physically or long term emotionally / psychologically by seeing you.
In short it depends on the situation.

marinemike Thu 12-Oct-17 16:20:51

situation was normal after birth, in was seeing my child, then because
i didnt want to spend night with ex, she stopped me seeing my child.

MrsBertBibby Thu 12-Oct-17 16:29:00

Then you need to take legal advice.

Sistersofmercy101 Thu 12-Oct-17 16:30:10

So you are the NRP?
(Who doesn't live with the child?)
A resident parent who has concerns for the safety of a child in their care has a Parental responsibility to safeguard that child's physical and emotional welfare.

marinemike Thu 12-Oct-17 16:34:53

whats NRP?

gamerchick Thu 12-Oct-17 16:40:21

None resident parent (as was said)

If you think she's using or going to use the child as a weapon to bring you into line then you need to see a solicitor. In the meantime you need to pay her maintanence putting aside any pay per view feelings you might have.

If you must be the grown up here thats the way it is.

marinemike Thu 12-Oct-17 16:41:57

yes i a non residental parent.

marinemike Thu 12-Oct-17 16:44:22

ok will as she has blocked all my access and contact ,how do i pay maintence?

eyebrowsonfleek Thu 12-Oct-17 16:50:26

Direct debit.

Maintenance and contact are separate issues.
If you don’t have bank details, save the money for now and bring it up during maintenance/the legal process.

eyebrowsonfleek Thu 12-Oct-17 16:51:15

That last maintenance should be mediation.

marinemike Thu 12-Oct-17 16:51:34

ok thnaks eyebrowsonfleek,as i dont hav her bank detail.

gamerchick Thu 12-Oct-17 16:53:06

For now use the CDs calculated to figure it out and save the money. When the baby is registered get a copy of the birth certificate (you can buy this yourself from the register office) and open a bank account for the child. while all this is going on save each week using the CSA calculator as a minimum. It means in any event that when they chase you for the money you'll have it ready.

You do need to a solicitor though.

gamerchick Thu 12-Oct-17 16:53:56

*csa calculator that should say.

X posts

KungFuPandaWorksOut16 Thu 12-Oct-17 17:08:39

You first have to apply for a MIAM.
(Mediation)

If she doesn't engage or it doesn't work you apply for a child arrangements order. I believe it costs £215. You can self represent or be represented legally.

FoofFighter Thu 12-Oct-17 17:25:01

Are you not paying maintenance for your child already?

Sistersofmercy101 Thu 12-Oct-17 17:25:11

Situation normal... "seeing" the child.
Parenting actually requires meeting the vast physical and emotional demands of the child for the benefit of no-one but the child.
Parents don't have any "rights" only "responsibilities" to the child and "seeing" them only for their own emotional gratification rather than for the benefit of the child is not in the best interests of the child.

blackteasplease Thu 12-Oct-17 17:25:11

You're getting good advice on her OP.

I think legal advice/ legal route with mediation sounds sensible. Try to make sure you remain reasonable and grown up about things even if you are hurt and missing your child.

You can't just storm round there amd take your child obviously. Not saying you were considering it but some might.

If you have no means of paying maintenance at the mo because she has blocked all contact etc perhaps put some money into a separate account for your child.

blackteasplease Thu 12-Oct-17 17:26:34

And sisters is correct 're responsibilities rather than rights. Always important to bear in mind.

marinemike Thu 12-Oct-17 17:35:40

not paying maintince already as child only 4 weeks old and eveything was ok for first 2 weeks, and I know what parenting is, I have an 11 year old child already, that why I came on here to ask as its first time problem for me.

marinemike Thu 12-Oct-17 17:36:56

also been to mediation and shes refused to go they are sending me court papers tomorrow.

RebootYourEngine Thu 12-Oct-17 17:38:30

How old is the child? Are you on the birth certificate?

blackteasplease Thu 12-Oct-17 17:39:58

Yeah but we don't know what you know and don't know cos it's a very brief OP!

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