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Feeling absolutely terrible. PLEASE SEND SOME LOVE :(

(15 Posts)
user1467480231 Tue 10-Oct-17 18:18:00

I'm reaching out to everyone on here as I've reach my absolute lowest and feel like there's no point carrying on with life.
My ex of 20 years of marriage left me last year for a woman 15 years younger than me (20 younger than him) and immediately got her pregnant.
Despite the huge pain and financial abuse, this woman continues to try and torment me as much as she can. She's very computer savvy and posts fake profiles, messages, emails, texts etc with pics of her and her new baby... pics of my ex cuddling the baby and pressies from my ex mother in law (of whom I had a great relationship with). Not only that, but she endlessly compares parts of her body with mine, obviously finding photos of me on my exes PC and analysing my legs, hair, boobs and dress sense.
Why on earth would she continue to do this (he tries and keeps her a secret and my children don't even know the name of their 6 months old half sibling) when she has what she wants? She's from a third world country and now has most of our money, a baby, 7 holidays last year and my ex. I just don't get it???!?!?!
Please don't tell me to block her as I constantly do that only for her to make new/fake profiles and continue to torture me.
Surely she should be more than happy with her lot?

GretchenFranklin Tue 10-Oct-17 18:23:37

Fucking hell OP shock

I don't know - would the police help you? Is it harassment or slander or some such.

Why has she got all the money? Did you get a fair settlement?

Either way she is obviously deranged and good luck to your idiot ex with that.

lolaflores Tue 10-Oct-17 18:23:45

Can the police intervene in this sort of thing now? I heard something on the news that they were going to be able to track down cyber bullies/trolls and bring charges? Perhaps someone else can verify that for you or you can do an internet search. Beyond which I don't know how you can avoid someone on the net.
Have you told your ex what she is up to? Do you have any contact with him at all?
I wonder if she is really still threatened by you.
Ask her why she needs so much of your attention?
Other than that she sounds downright evil, nasty piece of work. I would wonder if her life is quite as rosy as she paints it?

Bluesue26 Tue 10-Oct-17 18:23:55

She does it because she's scared and unhappy. Happy people don't go out of their way to hurt others. I know your hurting right now but I think you've got the upper hand. Your relationship was real. She's going to be looking over her shoulder the whole time she's with him. You should pity them both xx

CurlyhairedAssassin Tue 10-Oct-17 18:25:08

She’s insecure. Wouldn’t you be if your partner tried to keep her a secret? Maybe she’s got a feeling he won’t stay with her....

Just pity her and ignore.

user1467480231 Tue 10-Oct-17 18:31:40

Police have been informed but as they live abroad, there's nothing they can do.

I too would have thought that if she were happy and secure with him, she'd not constantly try to antagonise me. It's become her hobby and weird in the extreme. I'm the ex... she's not. Go figure?!!

WorraLiberty Tue 10-Oct-17 18:36:22

If you mean fake Facebook profiles, you can sort your settings out so only friends can message you.

I'm a bit confused about the timing though.

If he left you last year, how do they have a 6 month old baby, or was she the OW and he left you because she was pregnant?

Sweetbell Tue 10-Oct-17 18:39:07

Not sure if you've already done the following but how about setting up new social media/ email acc instead of continuously blocking
Give yourself peace
Let the clearly insecure OW send all the tedious bs to blank ACC's that you no longer view (but she won't be aware)

It is abusive and bullying of him/her to continue to drag you into their sad lives
And yes if she was truly happy she'd be too busy living it to do this crap

user1467480231 Tue 10-Oct-17 18:39:43

Sorry, found out they were had been having an affair for a few months and as soon as I found out, her pill apparently "didn't work" and amazingly she became pregnant. That old chestnut !!

Actually, think baby is 4.5 months old.

Whisky2014 Tue 10-Oct-17 18:42:40

Get your profile restricted so only people you know can add you or you can even set it up so that people have to ask you to add them. Simple.

WorraLiberty Tue 10-Oct-17 18:43:36

Oh I see, that makes sense.

I think she's pulling your leg though, to have managed 7 holidays in the same year she got pregnant and had a baby.

Either way, sort your privacy settings out and I would also change your phone number.

Try every way possible to cut her out of your life, if the police can't help.

Butterymuffin Tue 10-Oct-17 18:49:08

Agree that when she apparently has everything, it is desperately sad that she keeps trying to get at you like this. She must be incredibly insecure. And no wonder when she has the prize of a cheating man, who she must fear will do the same to her in time. It'll come back to bite her and she already knows it.

Where/on what sites is she posting these fake profiles and how do you become aware of them? People may be able to make some specific suggestions.

DamnDeDoubtanceIsSpartacus Tue 10-Oct-17 19:21:17

Is it her or is it him being vindictive?

Worriedrose Tue 10-Oct-17 19:57:37

Just remove yourself from anything online. It doesn't have to be forever. But for now it will save your sanity
Change email adressses.
I know it sounds extreme and as the victim you shouldn't have to do it, but honestly being completely uncontactable will help you.
She's clearly very insecure. Whatever will happen to them will happen to them.
Remove yourself from their lives.

I gave up Facebook and guess what, my friends were still my friends. Everyone else I couldn't have given a shit about

Worriedrose Tue 10-Oct-17 19:58:45

And have you told either your ex mother in law or your ex about this?
I wouldn't want to be with someone who was that batshit

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