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(43 Posts)
casio123 Thu 05-Oct-17 11:13:09

I have been dating a lovely man for around 5 months. We are both in our early thirties. He was engaged when he was 18 and has a teenage son from this relationship which ended shortly after his son was born. All fine. He has a nice relationship with his ex and their son.

We have very recently started to sleep together. He's firmly a lights off man. Even when we have previously been "fooling around" on the sofa watching a film etc he will switch off the lights before anything intimate happens. Again, all fine with me, didn't think much of it.

Last night he came to mine from work and we were having a little kiss and a cuddle and I suggested a blow job (which is something I really like to do). He got a bit flustered, I back peddled and said not to worry about it we didn't have too, and that's when he "confessed" that he has a tattoo from his youth...on his penis.

I haven't seen it, but it is his ex fiances name (which isn't a short name actually so i'm assuming it's taking up a lot of space!). He says he is totally mortified and that he was young and in love and it seemed a good idea at the time...

I feel weird about it, but I know i'm probably being unreasonable. What is the etiquette when he takes his kit off and I see it...Oh that's lovely? Very nice script they've done that in? Just ignore it? close my eyes when i'm down there?

I also feel a bit mortified that I have been having coffee or dinner with his ex and the whole time she'll know he has her name on his penis...but presumably I am overthinking that part too.

PinkHeart5914 Thu 05-Oct-17 11:15:54

I just wouldn’t say anything when you actually see it tbh.

He was young, he made a mistake, it happens so I don’t see why you feel “mortified” and yes your over thinking it

reflexfaith Thu 05-Oct-17 11:18:46

He could get a cover up tattoo ....something large and elaborate and you'd never know that the ex girlfriends name was theresmile

mrsRosaPimento Thu 05-Oct-17 11:20:23

I saw one on tattoo fixers that was covered with an anchor.

casio123 Thu 05-Oct-17 11:22:42

He could go to tattoo fixers and come back with a bloody tiger from penis to neck! That show makes me laugh, they put such big tattoos on people grin

CakesRUs Thu 05-Oct-17 11:24:52

I wouldn't over think it, if you stay together, you'll probably laugh about it one day. Silly, neigh, stupid thing to do, but he was young. It explains him wanting the light off.

Allthebestnamesareused Thu 05-Oct-17 11:26:49

Stealth boast that he can fit a long name on his penis grin

casio123 Thu 05-Oct-17 11:29:04

allthebestnamesareused Maybe it's in a smaller font than I imagine - it actually says "vanessa's cock" (not her real name). They may even have gone over two lines grin.

I think probably I was just bewildered that he had ever been a man to do penis tattoo is quite a thing isn't it. The lives we lead!!

Ellisandra Thu 05-Oct-17 11:34:28

It wouldn't put me off in any way except I'd probably collapse laughing the first time!

Poor bloke, all this lights off stuff sad

Tell him he can either stop worrying about it or get a cover up. It really works bother me, emotionality. I'd just think it looks awful grin

MyBrilliantDisguise Thu 05-Oct-17 11:34:32

If this isn't in the DF tomorrow then I don't know what will!

casio123 Thu 05-Oct-17 11:37:09

elisandra That's probably my worry! there's no way it can't look totally ridiculous...but you're not allowed to laugh at boys dangly bits are you. blush

My brilliant disguise I'm hoping "tattoo" is an innocuous enough title to slip under the radar..."penis tattoo!!!" maybe not so much.

category12 Thu 05-Oct-17 11:40:01

Quite a pain threshold.

Santawontbelong Thu 05-Oct-17 11:41:26

Maybe crocket or knit it a little / large 'jacket'!!??

casio123 Thu 05-Oct-17 11:42:18

category I don't even want to imagine! I have a little tattoo (obviously it's very sophisticated and classy and not on my nether regions) and it hurt like nothing else!!

casio123 Thu 05-Oct-17 11:43:35

santa a little penis sleeve? Googling black condoms...just cover the whole shooting match up?

Branleuse Thu 05-Oct-17 11:45:21

id probably wouldnt have sex with him again till he got it covered up.

I know people get stupid tattoos. My dp has his ex wifes name on him somewhere but got it covered up when he first started going out with me. I really dont need to see another womans name as some sort of stamp of ownership of him, especially on his penis of all places. Surely he could have got it sorted by now. Just book a bloody cover up session

GriefLeavesItsMark Thu 05-Oct-17 11:47:28

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casio123 Thu 05-Oct-17 11:50:24

Branleuse I would think it would be quite sore, and whilst I would prefer it wasn't there, I don't want to demand he gets it removed because i'm worried i will come across a bit unhinged. Do you think it would be unreasonable to ask him whether he would get it covered?

Onecutefox Thu 05-Oct-17 11:54:56

Poor bloke but he should have paid to cover it up. Imagine if you had something there as well. He would bend down thinking of you and then he reads, "Toby's vagina"
At least he could have put a plaster in there grin.

Onecutefox Thu 05-Oct-17 11:57:29

Lidl's plasters for children are very nice in the shape of a bat, a penguin, fish, dolphin. Different colours and very sticky. Could last a few days. Hehe.

casio123 Thu 05-Oct-17 11:58:49

Fox - tobys vagina and vanessas cock would be having a right old time of it and me and him would just be reading the radio times waiting for the end. I'm just going to pretend it's a birthmark...but it does put me off a bit, which I know is unfair.

GeekyWombat Thu 05-Oct-17 12:04:41

I'm going to sound really naive here, when getting tattoos on your bits are they done when things are erect or not? I.e. Is it something very large which gets bigger or something not really readable until later on in proceedings (when maybe a condom could cover the worst of it).

It's one of those things I'd try and be cool about but I definitely understand why it feels weird!

reflexfaith Thu 05-Oct-17 12:10:06

He'll have had the numbing cream for that one surely?

casio123 Thu 05-Oct-17 12:12:13

Geeky I would guess it's probably tricky to get erect when a big hairy man is poking a needle into your wee chap...but I have no idea!

reflexfaith Thu 05-Oct-17 12:12:57

I was totally being facetious when I suggested a cover up
I would just ignore it and I dont think it's a big deal really

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