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Does anyone have a partner in prison ?

(15 Posts)
Glowsticksforthehoechicks Wed 20-Sep-17 00:00:14

Hi everyone

I'm a long time lurker first time poster I was wondering if anyone else had a partner serving a prison sentence there seems to be plenty of support for American spouses but here not so much , I'm struggling to adapt so I was hoping to find some words of encouragement

Thank you 😊

inmyshoos Wed 20-Sep-17 00:04:54

I don't have any experience of this but I can imagine it must be really tough for you. Have you got family/friends in RL giving you support? How long will he be in for?

Glowsticksforthehoechicks Wed 20-Sep-17 00:10:04

Thank you for your reply , were six months into a four year sentence I have family support but I don't like to burden them with it. I suppose I'm just adjusting to the loneliness xx

scottishdiem Wed 20-Sep-17 00:26:06

I think you need to do two things.

1. Give yourself things to do and busy yourself. Learn new things or read more books etc.

2. Prepare for when he gets out. He will be changed, he will be different and it will take time to adjust. There are a few prisoner support charities so perhaps you can volunteer with them to learn and help you prepare?

6demandingchildren Wed 20-Sep-17 08:20:51

Their is an online secure forum called pcuk, it's for families of those inside. It's very non judgemental and it really is a good source of help xx

6demandingchildren Wed 20-Sep-17 08:22:11
It's a bit hard to find so here is the link xx

AgentProvocateur Wed 20-Sep-17 08:22:50

There's also an organisation that I've worked with called Families Outside if you're in Scotland. They're very good.

Foniks Wed 20-Sep-17 08:28:33

There are a few places for support. Do you have children together? There is support and counseling for children of prisoners to, because it can affect them so badly sometimes.
I agree he will have changed after his 4yr sentence. Sometimes couples can overcome that, sometimes not. So try to prepare for the change to help you and to help him try to return to normal.

There are charities too, that help prisoners and their families. Ask around. Google services in your area.

Sorry you're going through this. So many people don't realise how much the family and those close to a prisoner are also being punished.

Glowsticksforthehoechicks Wed 20-Sep-17 09:23:55

Thank you so much for all your replies we do have children together amd your exactly right about how we also get punished , he's committed a non violent offence but the judgment we've faced has been awful , thank you for pointing me in the right direction xx

Summerswallow Wed 20-Sep-17 09:31:27

Glow it feels like the whole family is being punished, doesn't it? I don't have a family member inside but a friend of mine does research in this area and it is eye-opening and shows that often, the whole family, ends up affected. I hope you get support here and on the other boards.

Glowsticksforthehoechicks Wed 20-Sep-17 12:22:53

Thank you for your kind words summer they way people look and talk to me now is as if I'm magically grown two heads , also I've heard some adults say some pretty disgusting stuff in ear shot of my children so your kind words mean a great deal at the moment xx

Myheartbelongsto Wed 20-Sep-17 13:46:52

Hi op,

My boyfriend came out in July so I completely understand how you must be feeling. Very true about the whole family being affected. My boyfriend actually said it's not really a sentence for him but his family.

Hope your OK, feels like time has stopped.

How is your partner coping also?

Pannnn Wed 20-Sep-17 14:01:27

If you are anywhere the Noerth West, Partners of Prisoners are top. POPs.

Glowsticksforthehoechicks Wed 20-Sep-17 14:21:22

My partner is coping really well as awful as it sounds he needed to go there to re evaluate his life , he's using prison as he should i.e. Getting himself clean , how did u find visits ? They make me terribly nervous and I don't really want to go xx

Glowsticksforthehoechicks Wed 20-Sep-17 14:21:52

Also I am in the northwest so will have a look at that thank you so much xx

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