I split up with my partner of 12 years about 4 months ago and I'm still trying to come to terms with things.
I'm kind of thinking about what a "normal" relationship should be, and if my expectations were too high.
Basically the main reason we split was because he was "flirting" with another woman online, that he met in a club. I think to him it was just fantasy, and he insisted he would never touch another woman in RL, but as he'd done this before more than once, I ended things.
We still keep in touch on and off and I know at the moment he's struggling with depression. He's acted in a very selfish deceitful way with the online conversations, which is why I don't want to ever get back with him... but then there's another part of me that thinks should I have ended things? Now we are both miserable and I've walked away from someone who I know truly loves me.
I suppose you could say maybe he doesn't love me that much if he did what he did, but life isn't black and white.. as I've said he's been a selfish idiot and now he's suffering the consequences, yet I still feel sad for him, and for me.
My best mate's partner flirts with other women online, and he's caused her a lot of heartache, and I know many many more people that have dealt with the same thing.
I find it so depressing that it seems so normalised to me. Just wondering what other people think, is this sort of thing a dealbreaker to you?
I keep thinking what will happen if/when I move on and try starting another relationship, will this just happen again? Can most guys really be trusted not to do this? Is it normal?
Sorry about all of the questions, I'm just still trying to get my head around what's happened. I know it isn't just men that do this, but personally I know that I would never do it to someone that I loved, it really isn't that difficult to control yourself :/
Anyway thanks for reading I would appreciate everyone's thoughts.
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Too much to ask?
19 replies
0emerald0 · 19/09/2017 14:49
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