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Things you don't miss about an Ex

(271 Posts)
Wheelycote Sun 17-Sep-17 09:14:29

Recently become single and have been bereft. I read something on another thread and it reminded me of a behaviour ex had. Sulking.
It's strange how, things like that become the norm.

The rose tinted glasses are starting to fall. It won't happen overnight, we were together for 8 years.

Pls share something about an ex, that you don't miss.

letsdolunch321 Sun 17-Sep-17 09:19:15

His snoring
Talking down to me
Putting friends before his family
His inability to speak up to his mother when she was clearly being spiteful to me
Using credit cards to the extreme that we had to remortgage.

Hense we are now divorced !!

24hoursfliesby Sun 17-Sep-17 09:21:46

Loads and loads!
Don't miss him disappearing all night and lying awake wondering where he is while calling him every hour.
Don't miss his anger and constantly walking on egg shells.
Don't miss how all my friends and family disliked him.
Don't miss his unreasonable boss who only gave him a weeks holiday a year and told him he could like it or lump it!
Don't miss him winding up the dog.
Don't miss the snoring and washing his filthy work clothes!
I suppose if it was a good relationship I'd miss more!!!

May50 Sun 17-Sep-17 09:23:28

Snoring. Spending 30mins in the bog on his iPad or phone every morning and evening. Being lazy and doing nothings by in the house. Not contributing a penny. - so no impact on the household work/finances at all really when he left - apart from I get the single person discount now on council tax - it's a win/win .

Movingon1611 Sun 17-Sep-17 09:28:40

Going out every weekend with his mates playing football in the afternoon and then out all night so he was useless on Sunday and didn't want to do anything with the kids
Never helping round the house
Mood swings so I was also on egg shells
Emotional blackmail
Suicide threats, leaving threats
Accusing me of having affairs every other week (not sure how I was supposed to be doing that when I never went anywhere!)
Criticising me for liking my job
Making me change jobs-same field- because he didn't want to give up football at weekends so I ended up going part time and taking a 20k a year pay cut- he expected me to still contribute the same amount to the household bills
The constant lying
Ignoring the kids
Not getting up in the morning

I could go on and on

Queenofthedrivensnow Sun 17-Sep-17 09:35:12

Drinking nothing but coffee even with meals.
Wanting to spend all his free time liking things up in his iPad.
Grubby towels left out.
Lying about smoking
Thinking he has superior parenting abilities to me.
Bullying dd1.
Just generally being a fucking arse hole

Offred Sun 17-Sep-17 09:37:41

How I felt like he hated me but also needed me just to function.

His constant sneering and eye rolling.

How everything was a competition that he had to win.

How he had to be in control of everything all the time.

How his moods controlled my whole life.

His regular flights of absolute fury over the tiniest thing.

The feeling of dread I would get before spending any time with him.

Wheelycote Sun 17-Sep-17 09:47:56

Cheers! There's s few listed above that I recognise!!
Snoring features high!

He didn't like people and either people loved or loathed him. I haven't socialised much for a long time!!! Muon doing but it became easier easier not to have people in my life, that way I wouldn't have to make excuses when he'd let me down

CountingDownToBedtime Sun 17-Sep-17 10:20:21

Don,t miss the huffing & puffing whilst getting ready for work.
The moodswings.
Dreaded him walking up the front path from work.
Treading on eggshells to try & keep the peace,as hated arguing in front of our Daughter.
Him coming home drunk all weekend from the pub.
Farting & snoring after the said drinking & not getting out of bed til next afternoon.
Selfish & tight with money,never wanted to contribute to things we needed for the home.
Wasted 14 years with that man,but am now married to a man who,s the complete opposite,who,s kind,cheerful,generous & rarely drinks,and would do anything for his

BatshitCrazyWoman Sun 17-Sep-17 10:24:30

I don't miss anything at all! Horrible, controlling, abusive man.

Shodan Sun 17-Sep-17 10:32:13

The noisy, slurpy, eating and drinking.
Opening the door to my friends in his pants
The sex- 7 minutes was a long one grin
Bloody sports on tv- football, golf, rugby, darts, racing...anything rather than something we could both enjoy.
The pomposity.
Slapping my bum all the time.

And the 'baby' voice he would put on, especially when I grew exasperated with him snoring on the sofa and asked him to just go to bed - "But I like being wiv oo" angry angry angry

HeavenlyEyes Sun 17-Sep-17 10:42:20

Sullking, snoring, the mess, how if I told him something he had to google it to check as he could not trust I knew something better than him, the porn addiction, the lying, the unfaithfulness, how he really actually detested me but had some weird co-dependency shiz going on so hated and loved me at the same time, how if I looked at him the wrong way he would be a wounded puppy for days and would sit there beseechingly mawling my knee telling me how much he loved me. Oh and the shit sex. And the financial incontinence and debt.

QueenNefertitty Sun 17-Sep-17 10:45:20

The explosive anger (never aimed at DS or I- always inanimate objects/ work projects).

The secret drinking (secret because he was ashamed).

The falling asleep at 8 o clock every night, leaving me to look after our baby alone.

And this is unkind... but honestly I don't miss his life limiting medical condition, which he didn't manage well.

OnMyShoulders Sun 17-Sep-17 10:48:59

His blowing hot and cold. It was emotionally exhausting.

The pressure he put on me to do stuff sexually that I just wasn't into.

The fact that he never complimented me.

His lies and manipulation.

His selfishness.

Oysterbabe Sun 17-Sep-17 11:18:38

His mother.

Onlymeeeeee Sun 17-Sep-17 11:33:33

Putting work colleagues before family.
Demanding I contribute same amount to family bills even though I'm PT he's FT.
Calling our son "mate".
Half-assed attempts at DIY and not clearing up.
Chasing the dog in the garden "as a game" even though it makes him hard to catch on walks.
Leaving every contact with his extensive
family to me then complaining we never saw them.
Pretending to give up smoking.

Thankfully the divorce is in progress

AufderAutobahn Sun 17-Sep-17 11:36:31

This sounds really weird but one thing I do not miss is the tickling. Ex BF did it constantly. Even when I begged him not to, or yelled at him for it, he did it. Couldn't be in a room with him without a jab in my sides with his fingers, or the tickling. When he wasn't doing it he was talking about it, with that silly grin on his face. He did occasionally apologise for it, saying it was an excuse to touch me as I was so cute, but it never stopped. After we split up, the sheer bliss of sitting on a sofa, drinking a hot, fresh cup of tea, knowing I could enjoy it without someone plonking themselves next to me and jabbing me in the sides, causing me to spill the tea down myself, was something I really did appreciate as one of life's great pleasures. There are many other things that I don't miss but that's one of them, however bizarre it may sound!

user1470296287 Sun 17-Sep-17 11:36:40

Picking his nose rolling bogies and flicking them on the floor(yuk)
Being a miserable git ...most of the time
His many expensive hobbies
His bad money management
His solitude
bad dress sense
shit taste in music
His very tiny willy..haha sorry but had to mention that.
Skid marks ..always in his pants and toilet pan.

I could go on but its just good to highlight how much better life is without him.

Wheelycote Sun 17-Sep-17 11:42:33

Counting that gives me hope if you've met someone whose the opposite!!

kalinkafoxtrot45 Sun 17-Sep-17 11:43:38

Porn mags - Razzle, for God's sake angry
Falling asleep in the pub after a couple of pints
Crying every time we argued
His awful cooking

Wheelycote Sun 17-Sep-17 11:43:40

Shodan opening the door in his pantsshock

Wheelycote Sun 17-Sep-17 11:44:52

My exhusband would do the baby voice!!! Even when trying to get amoured! Bleughhhh would turn me off!!!

Wheelycote Sun 17-Sep-17 11:46:27

User the bogie thingshock

Tiba Sun 17-Sep-17 11:46:57

Don't miss him calling me names

Don't miss him telling me I'm crazy

Don't miss him not letting me see my friends or family

Don't miss him taking all my money

Don't miss him at all

Queenofthedrivensnow Sun 17-Sep-17 11:49:31

How could I forget about the fucking eggshells!!

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