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Do I tell her or keep quiet and move on...

10 replies

fullspeedbrunette · 18/08/2017 07:53

Me and my boyfriend split up about 2 months ago. We continued to be FWB.
I found out last night that during that time, he was dating his ex girlfriend. While she was away on holiday, he was sleeping with me.
He text me yesterday to see how I am, completely oblivious that I know he's got a girlfriend and what he's done. She also obviously has no idea.

I just need to keep quiet, block him and move on don't I ?

But I'm so cross! How dare he play us off each other. And now that poor girl is stuck with him, and has no idea.

It's also made me feel a little inadequate if I'm honest... like he's picked the better party

Not sure what I'm looking for here, was just shocked and wanted to vent

OP posts:

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Gorgosparta · 18/08/2017 07:56

She may be aware its not exclusive.

You were fwb during this. So he hasnt really done anything wrong to you.

Cut contact for your own well being.

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MorrisZapp · 18/08/2017 07:56

The guy's a selfish twat by the sounds of it. In my day this was called two timing.

Don't tell the ex though. Her lookout.

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fullspeedbrunette · 18/08/2017 08:22

Gorgo - he kind of has because I did ask if he was seeing anyone a few times and he was adamant he wasn't. He said we could have fun til we both met someone ... not whilst we were dating other people!!

OP posts:

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PurpleWithRed · 18/08/2017 08:26

If you were her what would you want you to do? Definitely dump him and tell him exactly why.

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user1488575338 · 18/08/2017 08:35

He really has had his cake and eaten it hasn't he! Why would you agree to a Fwb arrangement with someone you had a proper relationship with. I would find that so insulting to be honest, still good enough to shag occasionally but not good enough as girlfriend material. Cut him out and find someone who wants all of you all the time.

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isitjustme2017 · 18/08/2017 08:37

I would dump him and tell him you know about his girlfriend. I wouldn't tell her though as that would just make you look spiteful and jealous. It will be amusing to think he is panicking that you will tell her though!!!
You've had a lucky escape OP and he will no doubt treat her the same. Find someone nice.

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MyheartbelongstoG · 18/08/2017 09:42

Why would you let him treat you like this!!!

I'd just disappear and leave him to wonder why.

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chips4teaplease · 18/08/2017 09:47

They love to do this. My ex did and I went along with it - easy sex and I like him being unfaithful to her with me. Shrug your shoulders and move on. As long as you and he are on equal terms, he's being used as much as he's using, it's harmless enough. Not something to mention to his girlfriend though, unless you want to hurt her. His having an gf might be enough to put you off him, perhaps. As yet, he isn't 'playing you off against each other', he thinks you're both in blissful ignorance so he can go on shagging the pair of you. Fabulous. Doncha just love men???

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chips4teaplease · 18/08/2017 09:48

like should be liked. I did preview, and missed it. We're not 'at it' any more. He's dead, poor man.

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fullspeedbrunette · 18/08/2017 10:38

Chips - don't you just !! Bloody men.
He always said they had a fantastic relationship so I'll just leave them to it! Poor girl