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Can you help me get my head around these damily dynamics?

(2 Posts)
malificent7 Wed 12-Jul-17 15:15:02

My late mother was bipolsr and abusive ( hitting me hard / pounding mewhen i was sick/ wet the bed etc) And emotionally abusuve.
My dad was in denial (oblivious)and although great in many ways, was and is controlling and dosnt do emotions.
I was scapegoated i think. My sister i think was golden chikd. Very succesful, smooth life trajectory, married etc.
Ive been a bit of a mess eith no permanent xareer/job. We hardly talk. I wanted a relationship but she quite rightly distant as i was horrid during a bad patch of mental illness. She has moved miles away ( dont blame her! )
i live nesr my dad and ges overly involved and invested. Mum is dead.
When i had dd i was alone and moved bk in with them. Now live nearby.
I now have a lovely dp and when i got with him my dad got quite abusive and criticised my situation.
My dad helos out a lot.... he geloed dp ip my rented flag but then the flip side is he comes round and criticisesmy housework etc
He got a new gf 5 months after mum died and i feel sore about it.
I love him and dont want to go no contact but how do i go low contact when we live so close and he has a great relationship with dd?

I also find his politicsl views and attitudes toward immigration hard tostomach but

malificent7 Wed 12-Jul-17 16:18:28

Family dynamics even!

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