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Blocking/Disconnecting on Social Media/ Not Replying: after the event

(4 Posts)
IdlePhilosophy Sun 25-Jun-17 20:41:50

I remember being told that if you have a toxic type/bad boy ex-bf that if some time after you've ended it (I'm talking at least several months) that if they contact you and you don't reply, that they regard this as a "victory" - as in you are still affected by them enough to "make a stand" and not reply.

And that the behaviour that both presentionally indicates (and in fact shows you actually have) strength and have moved on is a cool and uninterested reply - because you actually really don't care and aren't scared of re-engaging because you have moved on.

With that in mind, if you are connected with someone on social media if you disconnect from them after the event, is that too much of a "I've still not moved on" statement? I mean if you've really moved on why would you care enough to disconnect from them on your network?

Assume for site related reasons, it would be fairly obvious to the person that you have disconnected from them - as in not like FB where someone with 1k friends might not notice.

HildaOg Sun 25-Jun-17 20:52:58

The theory you heard is wrong. When people are still emotionally attached they reply. When they don't give a shit, they don't. Why would they?

Silence drives the attention seeker nuts. Nothing is more effective.

Jengnr Sun 25-Jun-17 21:06:45

I have an emotionally abusive ex. I met him through a forum and even after we split he was constantly goading me into replying.

The day I disengaged and stopped answering/acknowledging him was so liberating for me and it drove him literally mad.

Even now, eight and a half years later, he still tries to get my attention every now and again. It's pathetic but can be entertaining.

Worrynot1 Mon 26-Jun-17 11:39:48

I have just disconnected from my ex split Feb , we have been replying to each other escalating in anger on both sides. She hurt me by walking out without explanation I have just hurt her back by exposing her sordid little affair. She is hurt I am hurt still love her but I don't hate any more which is the emotion we run to when those we trust the most hurt us.

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