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Has he lost interest? Or just busy

(11 Posts)
StaciesMom Sat 17-Jun-17 21:00:08


Need some advice please.

Met a guy OLD and have been on two lovely dates. He was very complimentary after the first and told me he was away for 2 1/2 weeks with work and then a holiday but that he'd like to see me again before he went so we had date no. 2. He also told me once he was back from holidays he wanted to see me and would fit in around my work and children etc. A couple of other comments about longer term plans but specifically said he would make himself available the weekend he comes back from holidays. He also mentioned bringing me a present back etc.

He went away and text on first day to say it had been manic etc and hoped I was ok. I replied but he didn't text again. Two days later I text him in relation to something we had been talking about on date and he replied back again saying 'busy, manic, meetings etc but would be in touch'. That was about 3 / 4 days ago and I haven't heard anything more from him. He flies on holiday tomorrow.

I'm rubbish at dating and reading signs and not sure how to take the lack of contact? He was writing me such lovely long messages beforehand and I looked forward to hearing from him. Obviously if he's not interested, that's fine, I'm not invested enough to date. I just don't want to spend next two weeks looking forward to something, if the lack of contact means he's over it. He hasn't been OLD site in over a week. And never seems to be on whats app.

Just not sure what to make of it all?

TheNewSchmoo Sat 17-Jun-17 21:02:20

My Dad once told me when a man wants to contact you, he will. He's not been wrong yet. Every time I have had the "I'm just busy" bullshit, it means they're losing interest.

Smellbellina Sat 17-Jun-17 21:04:01

If you need to ask the answer is he's not interested I'm afraid

Justmadeperfectflapjacks Sat 17-Jun-17 21:04:34

He is playing at being far too important/busy to contact you
Shouts loser to me.
You deserve more.

user1480334601 Sat 17-Jun-17 21:07:35

If he's too busy to message you he's not worth it! Forget him and move on, find someone who has time for you

StaciesMom Sat 17-Jun-17 21:16:08

Yeah I kind of guessed that was the case. Just sometimes I self sabotage because of insecurity and misreading stuff so wanted to check my head was in right place about it. Walking away it is x

NewDayDawning Sun 18-Jun-17 00:09:52

Nobody is ever too busy to send a text. He doesn't want to.

Move on to someone who deserves you.

Josuk Sun 18-Jun-17 00:22:48

A friend of mine has recently started OLD and is similar to you, so I'll say the same thing that I kept telling her at the beginning.
Don't get too invested early on. One, two, or a few of good early dates doesn't yet mean anything.
Men use a lot of nice words to make a good impression.
Keep looking around. Take your time.

Talk to more men on-line. If this one wants to come back, if he is genuinely busy (which is not impossible) - he'll come back.
If not, good riddance.

LesisMiserable Sun 18-Jun-17 00:37:21

I think he's not interested too, but doesnt know how to say it without hurting your feelings. Doesn't make him a loser, just makes him human. If you dont hear from him whilst he's away, block his number and move on.

StaciesMom Sun 18-Jun-17 07:46:41

I wouldn't say I was too invested. I'm talking to other men and would still date them if I liked one of them. I was just pondering the sudden change of behaviour and wondered what people thought. Thank you all for your comments and support. OLD is hard confused

Ladyformation Sun 18-Jun-17 15:11:42

Some people compartmentalise. I wouldn't text someone I'd been on two dates with if I was away or manic. Doesn't necessarily mean anything. I agree with Josuk - if he comes back great, don't cut off that possibility, but keep shopping around in the interim.

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