Talk

Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

AIBU to have a little cry?

(32 Posts)
whereisthesunshine Thu 01-Jun-17 13:53:32

It's my 35th birthday tomorrow and it just dawned on me that for the first time in 9 years there will be no one there with me. Dh walked out for OW about 11 months ago and whilst I feel generally a lot stronger and mostly positive, it has just hit me now.

I used to love to wake up to coffee brought to me in bed, flowers etc. Tomorrow morning I will wake up alone and it'll just be like every other morning. I know he's been a dickhead and long term I'm better off without him, but right now I'm miserable.

I am going out with friends at the weekend and will get messages etc from family (too far away to visit) but I can't seem to shake the sadness today.

AIBU to feel like that even though, all things considered, things are not that bad?

Janeinthemiddle Thu 01-Jun-17 13:55:22

YANBU! it's your birthday and you can cry if you want to!

Would you be able you plan something to do tomorrow? Even if you'll be doing it alone? Go out for a meal maybe?

Peachypossum Thu 01-Jun-17 13:57:56

Have a little cry, but then can you plan something nice for the morning? Expensive coffee you wouldn't normally have, fresh flowers, your favourite weekend/holiday breakfast? A new book, or maybe some pamper time at home with face mask etc, good chocolates? (not sure if you'll be working so some might not be time possible)

Sorry your feeling sad and for what an arse your ex has been.

Happy birthday for tomorrow x

maras2 Thu 01-Jun-17 14:02:43

Have the best day that you can.
brew flowers
Not to be opened till tomorrow smile

whereisthesunshine Thu 01-Jun-17 14:04:38

Thank you, everyone. I've got a long day at work tomorrow and won't be back till after 8pm. Got some nice food sorted for evening. We always make a fuss on people's birthdays at work so there will be cake etc. That's what I mean with 'things aren't that bad'. It's the morning really - nice coffee might help 😊

noego Thu 01-Jun-17 14:04:51

The first birthday I had on my own I did absolutely nothing. Stayed in bed. Wore PJ's all day. Had take away delivered. Drank wine. Smoked a spliff, farted a lot, had a nice soak in the bath, had fantasy sex with myself. Basically all the things I couldn't do before and now could do without a care in the world.
So don't feel sorry for your self, EMBRACE the freedom.
Have a happy, happy, birthday and really enjoy the day xxxx

Adora10 Thu 01-Jun-17 14:14:09

Wish I was 35 OP, you are so young and there's a big world out there waiting for you!

whereisthesunshine Thu 01-Jun-17 15:54:19

I know I am being silly, Adora. It's just not where I wanted to be. Hey ho, onwards and upwards.

TheNaze73 Thu 01-Jun-17 16:10:56

Round your friends up, it'll be Friday night. All the cool kids play on a Friday.
Have a good one

Peachypossum Thu 01-Jun-17 16:21:54

If heading out for work I would have nice coffee with mums net before leaving, and would wear my favourite work outfit, make up, hair and undies so I felt good about myself and comfy, as weird as that probably sounds. blush

picklemepopcorn Thu 01-Jun-17 16:22:35

If you've time on the way home today, buy yourself something nice for breakfast- croissants or smoked salmon or both! Plan to pick up a costa on th way in.

professorvape Thu 01-Jun-17 16:25:39

Get dressed up in your favourite clothes, fix your face, but yourself some stupidly posh coffee and a nice breakfast for the morning, enjoy the fuss in work, get a whopper of a steak or whatever you fancy for tea (including a big tub of naice ice cream). Start your very own brand new birthday ritual. I get it though πŸ’x

Justbreathing Thu 01-Jun-17 18:48:35

Sorry you feel this way. I know exactly how it feels. My first birthday on my own was horrific. Nothing to add, but to say happy birthday. Try and fill it with things you like.
Lots of us have been there and we all know how you're feeling
You are not alone xxx

whereisthesunshine Thu 01-Jun-17 19:59:11

It's just another one if those firsts that will be different from now on, isn't it? Have bought nice breakfast bits, favourite outfit ready to wear and I've just changed the sheets 😁 Bottle of Prosecco and lemon cheesecake in the fridge for tomorrow night when I will be alone. Above all, I will choose to feel good! Thanks, everyone.

Calphurnia Thu 01-Jun-17 20:03:21

flowers for you birthday girl.
Treat yourself!

Justbreathing Fri 02-Jun-17 08:51:07

Happy birthday today x

Peachypossum Fri 02-Jun-17 09:00:46

Happy birthday Where is, hoping the sunshine is as lovely where you are as it is here this morning and you've had a nice morning. Have a fab time at the weekend with your friends x

bluediamonds Fri 02-Jun-17 09:10:28

Happy birthday πŸŽ‚ 😊.

Have a great day! cakewineflowers❀ x

pog100 Fri 02-Jun-17 09:10:38

Happy birthday from a stranger 😜

bluediamonds Fri 02-Jun-17 09:11:11

That face was supposed to be wine! Doh!

picklemepopcorn Fri 02-Jun-17 09:59:13

Happy birthday! Hope brekkie was yum, and you enjoy tonight's feast too!

neonfrog Fri 02-Jun-17 10:37:14

Happy 35th Birthday β˜•οΈπŸŒ·πŸŒΈπŸŒΊπŸ’πŸΎ

grosseconnasse Fri 02-Jun-17 11:54:33

Happy birthday OP! Enjoy your coffee, cake, cheesecake, prosecco, and time with friends at the weekend! brewcakewineflowers

Happybunny19 Fri 02-Jun-17 12:55:43

Happy birthday OP

AndieNZ Fri 02-Jun-17 12:57:21

Happy Birthday OP!

Treat yourself and enjoy your day cakewineflowers

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now