Hello there, I'm not exactly sure how to use this site as I never have before but I've decided I need advice and have no idea where to get it without betraying the trust of my son.
My son has begged me not to tell anyone about what I'm going to say so I'll try and stay as anonymous as possible.
He's 21 and in a relationship with another man, let's call him 'Josh' to make things easier. I've never particularly liked this 'Josh' since I first met him just over a year ago. Whenever my son came to ours and Josh was over, he always acted very different. He was quieter than usual and a lot more reserved and also seemed to spend the entire time staring at Josh as if asking for confirmation that everything was okay when it clearly was. I didn't really think much of this at the time as my son does have anxiety but he just seemed on edge.
My son has been contacting both me and his brother less and less recently and I wasn't sure if it was because he was growing up or if there was another reason. I managed to get a hold of one of my son's friends who said my son never really 'hung out' with them much anymore and seemed to spend a his time with Josh. I don't know if they were still friends but he said he didn't really know why my son just stopped talking to her.
I've seen my son's social media and of the few things there are the only person he ever seems to be with is Josh.
Last Sunday, my son turned up at my house unannounced, which never happens, and said that he wanted to talk. He didn't really say anything for a while and then began crying. He said that he was sorry he never answered my texts or calls and that Josh had told him he didn't need me anymore because he had him. He said he was too scared to tell Josh he wanted to see me as at Christmas he asked to spend it with me and Josh had had started shouting at him and I don't know if he did anything else, as my son refused to talk about that night anymore. He said Josh didn't like him going out but Josh went out a lot himself and when my son accused him of cheating, which from what I can piece together he did, Josh had had a melt down and reversed it saying my son must have cheated and that he wasn't loyal and didn't believe that Josh wasn't cheating. I told him that if he didn't want to be with Josh he could leave but my son then said that somehow Josh was the best thing that ever happened to him and he loved him. He stayed for a while and then left as we both had work the next day and he lives a good three hour drive away.
My gosh. I'm very sorry for the little rant but as it's a bank holiday I didn't have work to take my mind off the worry so I just did a little rant.I'm not really sure what advice I want but I just want to make sure my son is safe and I really don't know how. Thank you anyway x
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Relationships
My son's ABUSIVE boyfriend - what do I do?
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ddishews · 29/05/2017 18:56
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