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Dp always blames me

(6 Posts)
strawberryblondebint Thu 25-May-17 20:02:33

Background. We have a 6 year old with ASD. I am in the last week of my teaching placement and about to qualify. I'm shattered. I'm stressed and tired.
Picked up asd child from minder. She was on the verge of a meltdown as she wasn't getting time to play in the garden. I bribed her home. She then was on he verge of a meltdown until bedtime. Constant questioning. Telling me I was hurting her feelings (I told her off for poor behaviour), in a cycle of repeat. Just constant low level moaning and whining and questioning. I thought my head would explode. I'm so tired and so stressed. He then has a go at me when I'm in the middle of my 400 jobs about my tone of voice. This quickly turns into a character assassination where he tells me I need to change. I stress everyone out and I don't realise how much everyone (I.e him).
This is because he goes to collect his step children tomorrow. It's an hour and a bits drive. I don't drive.
All the time he's sitting on the sofa. He only intervenes to undermine my parenting. He then fucks off for a walk whilst I settle dd. Who has been on and off questions and whining for over an hour.
He's going to come back and want to talk about this. From experience this would likely be another hour of how shit I am.
AIBU to tell him to fuck off and give me peace

Hermonie2016 Thu 25-May-17 20:34:13

I think every partner needs to hear feedback but it's obviously best done if said constructively.I maybe biased as my stbxh was massively stressy and just expected me to take it.
Being understanding to a partners stress doesn't mean having to tolerate bad behaviour.
I think you should look at your behaviour and judge if you are being too stressy.Does he have a point?
However it's not acceptable for him to then go on for an hour as that is bullying.Its absolutely fair for you to ask him to speak to you constructively and then stop!

strawberryblondebint Thu 25-May-17 21:36:19

I just take it so personally. It's never him at fault. Always me. Thanks though

Thinkingblonde Thu 25-May-17 23:34:12

Tell him to stop after ten minutes. Ten minutes is plenty of time to get his point across. You don't have to listen as he does a character assassination on you.

llangennith Thu 25-May-17 23:49:59

Finish your teaching qualification and get the hell out of this relationship. Good luckflowers

Brogadoccio Thu 25-May-17 23:52:00

A Blamer.

Life with A Blamer is hard. Been there.

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