Hi,
I am a regular poster on here but I have name changed for anonymity.
I am feeling very confused right now, and I have in the past struggled to navigate OLD. I have been 'seeing' a guy for the last month, we have been on four dates so far. We have loads in common and our dates have lasted for hours at a time. We talk daily.
On the 3rd date things got pretty steamy and we ended up having sex. I then messaged him later that day to say that I didn't want to continue a sexual relationship with someone when I wasn't sure if they were sleeping with other people. He responded that this was fine, he didn't want to sleep with other people nor was he looking to, and he wasn't a 'player'.
Anyway cue today at work. I am gushing about new guy to some of my work colleagues and one woman looks very embarrassed. She came over to me at the end of our work day and she said had met the same guy I have been seeing and they'd had casual sex only last week. This was after he'd told me he didn't want to sleep with other people.
My immediate reaction was anger at being lied to. Then I spoke to a couple of my friends who said I was overreacting as it was still early days, we barely know each other and there was no formal or explicit agreement for commitment. Another said he is just keeping his options open and probably told me he didn't want to have sex with other people so as not to scare me off. Whilst I can see their points of view, I can't shake the fact he lied to me about not wanting to have sex with other people.
Should I cut my losses with this one, or is this par for the course with OLD?
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Man I am seeing had sex with a colleague whilst we are dating...
PollyAndy · 19/05/2017 18:40
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