Hi all, I found some viagra in my partners study. It happened like this - we're having a baby and we started sorting the study out in order to convert it into a nursery. I opened a drawer and found a padded envelope and said, what's in there? Quite innocent, didn't cross my mind it would be anything even a bit interesting. Partner distracted me and took the envelope. I noticed he put it next to his desk on the floor, but because I was distracted with whatever he said I didn't think about it again until later. The next day when he was out I decided to see what it was or if he had hidden it. He hadn't, so I looked and was shocked that it was viagra from an online pharmacy.
Now the thing is, I have asked him in the past if he wanted to play around with little blue pills when we have our 'no kids' dirty weekends, and he was intrigued, so I assumed he knows it would turn me on.
I have been watching the supply since, and I know he isn't cheating, a quarter of a tablet (they're 100mg so he doesn't need full strength!) disappears every time we have sex, but only on the occasions where I have mentioned I'm horny earlier in the day therefore he can 'prepare' for it. I have noticed that if he hasn't taken one (spur of the moment sex) he either can't come or doesn't last very long, or loses his erection part way through.
Now my questions are: why hasn't he discussed it with me, given that he knows I would like to experiment? And why hasn't he hidden them? The envelope is right there, and he knows I go into the study to use the computer sometimes (or tidy up, occasionally!) so why hasn't it occurred to him that I might find them? Or does he want me to find them? He has been stressed lately, he has 'provider panic' because he is the earner, and he is applying for new jobs (he's a high flyer and loves that he earns well but this causes some stress), we are renovating the house in order to sell it, but does the fact that he needs viagra add to his stress, would me knowing make it easier for him to open up? He doesn't talk to me about his feelings much, he's very much a provider, one who looks after us and I guess he doesn't feel enough of a man if he needs help in any way. I'm thinking deep down he's a caveman! But genuinely wonderful, loving, caring and generous.
Does anyone have any advice, or similar situations? Did you let on you knew, or did you forget about it and let him have his secret? At first I felt betrayed but now I think it's just because he has trouble with erections otherwise, and I just wish he could have spoken to me about it. Soooo confused!!!! By the way, he's in his early forties and is confident in himself. Thanks in advance!
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Weird confusion...
9 replies
RachelA1 · 17/05/2017 11:21
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