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Do slow burners really exist?

(3 Posts)
mermaidofthewestside Tue 16-May-17 16:52:56

Hello Mumsnet,
Here's the thing.
I'm 40 years old & single.
I've had quite a selection of (rubbish) boyfriends & I always fall madly in love immediately & end up getting trampled into the ground.
Big repetitive pattern.
One of my exes I still see as he's my daughter's dad and his behaviour continues to be irrational & awful but anyway.....
So I have a friend who's a man.
My daughter & his daughter get on well & we hang out at weekends sometimes. We went on a couple of dates last year but decided to just be friends. All my friends keep saying they think we'd be great together & 'maybe he's a slow burner' - I keep brushing it off because I think that's bollocks.
He's been a friend for a year or so... Last weekend I started to feel like there might be a spark... I kind of fancied him and felt a bit drawn to him the whole day we were together (lots of people there not just us)
But can you be friends with someone & not fancy them & then fancy them? Anyone had this?
Thanks for reading my ramblings X

noego Tue 16-May-17 17:48:12

Oh yes. I have had this same thing. Turned out ok in the end. As I got to know them more and more I couldn't help myself. And they were not the usual "type" but they are so lovely. I found myself more interested in them as a person than as a body IYSWIM.
It was a slow burn and turned out ok for both of us. It is not a normal relationship as defined by society but it works for us.

HoHoHoHo Tue 16-May-17 18:07:26

I think they exist but you should definitely wait until you feel the spark before you start dating rather than dating in the hope it will materialise

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