Talk

Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Anxiety over OH

(6 Posts)
Herbie22 Mon 15-May-17 18:42:49

I have had anxiety issues since I was about sixteen. When I was pregnant I was anxious about the baby's movements to the point where I made myself quite ill.
Now baby is born I feel more relaxed about her but my anxiety is manifesting in a different way. I have become obsessed with the idea that OH will be angry with me.
OH is a good man and the love of my life. Obviously we have arguments, but who doesn't. He has never shouted at me but now I'm obsessed with the idea that he will. I feel scared to talk to him in case I upset him. Despite having a newborn baby I'm obsessed with keeping my house spotless and all ironing and washing done as much as possible in case OH shouts at me for not keeping the house to his standard. Deep down I know he won't but I still worry about it all day. I don't want to upset OP but I'm worried I'll make myself sick if I keep up like this. I'm sure he would feel awful if he knew I felt like this. Can anyone advice me on how to broach the subject with him?

mrholmes Mon 15-May-17 18:55:46

Try talking with him about it. This may help getting it out and with the anxiety. It may pass but you may need some kind of therapy to get to the root of this issue.

redannie118 Mon 15-May-17 19:22:10

Obsessive cleaning and tidying and anxiety are classic PND symptoms. Please talk to you HV ,she will be able to help. Also please try and talk to your husband, write it down if it's too difficult to say out loud.Once you hear him say that it won't upset him if the house is spotless it may help alleviate your worries. PND Is very difficult to see when you are in the middle of it so it's really important to get outside help. Good luck x

3littlebirdsmamma Mon 15-May-17 19:24:01

Could you talk to your healh visitor or midwife? Sending hugs OP.x

FormerNymphet Mon 15-May-17 20:46:41

I also think you should talk to your HV or GP.
I was displaying the same behaviours you are and I foolishly did not seek help for ages because I thought they would think I was a terrible mother and take my children away.
However, as my brilliant HV told me it was Post Natal Anxiety that was messing with my mind.

RunRabbitRunRabbit Mon 15-May-17 20:56:01

You won't make yourself sick. You already are sick. Sorry. You don't have to broach it with DH because it isn't actually about him. You need to tell him that your anxiety is out of control and you need help. Can you afford private therapy? If so, see if he can help you find a suitable therapist and sort out the childcare while you are there.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now