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Always listen to your gut

(3 Posts)
user1494111014 Mon 15-May-17 15:13:09

Was with a guy for ten months. Met him OLD. He was a very charming man. Gave me all the complements. Very OTT.
He was very sneaky with his phone. Always on it! We went away to Ibiza last summer. The night we got back he never answered his phone the whole night. Said he was sleeping! Naturally I believed him but my gut was telling me something was wrong. We then went to away in January and the day we got back he did the same. Went missing the whole day and never picked up his phone. I would ask where he was and he would say he was at his uncles and he fell asleep! He would then go on to say I was insecure. Paranoid. Typical of a man that's cheating. I ended the relationship in Feb and he never left me alone. Saying he loved me. Wants to make it work.
I took him back early April. Anyway cut a long story short. In the first week of being back together all amazing. Then went missing three times in the next week. I ended it.
The next day I found him on a swingers site. I had a feeling he had been cheating but never thought it was this. I checked the swingers site coz a mate of my had told me about the site only a week before I ended it. Everything then made sense. All the times he never answered his phone. My gut knew it but I never listened coz the man made me feel like I was going mad. I guess why I'm writing this post is to say ALWAYS listen to your gut...if the red flags are there, get out!
Classic lines of a cheater.
Said he was impotent so we did not have to have sex.
Sorry you feel that way
Your paranoid
Your so insecure
Never answered his phone
Always on his phone when with him
Sneaky with his phone
Always takes the phone to the loo
Bring ott with complements
Bring ott with gifts coz of guilt.

HildaOg Mon 15-May-17 15:35:01

When someone tells you you're paranoid, what they mean is you have a reason to be and by calling you paranoid they hope to distract you by making you too embarrassed to recognise the obvious and question your interpretation of reality.

I always follow my gut. People can lie and some lie well but my gut has never been proven wrong and always seems to be right.

HavingAnOffDAy Mon 15-May-17 15:48:00

I couldn't agree more.

By the time it becomes obvious that something out of the ordinary is going on you'll have been picking up subliminal clues for a while. Listen to your gut as soon as alarm bells start ringing.

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