How much responsibility do men generally take for babies?
Me and my husband have a four month old and I don't feel like he is really parenting. He changes nappies when he's here and does play with the baby for 10-15 mins at a time when he wants to but when he doesn't he just seems to switch off being a parent. He can be in the same room as baby who will be babbling away but he will just have a nap, watch TV or play on his laptop. When he's has enough of listening to baby playing he goes in the other room and puts his headphones in. He works 9-5 and goes to the gym/for a run 3 or 4 times a week so also gets time away from home.
In contrast I feel like I am always in parent mode and never get any leisure time. If I'm in the room with baby (which is most of the time) I'm at least keeping an eye out but mostly playing and engaging with her. I feel like he sees me as the parent - so if I'm in the room/house he's off the hook. Also I'm breastfeeding so I can't really leave the house without her.
I only get time to myself when I go for a shower and he looks after her for half an hour (only a couple
of times a week) but he doesn't even seem to cope with this as I come downstairs to him with his head in his hands and huffing and puffing because she's been crying.
I just feel overwhelmed by the 24/7 responsibility. I cannot sleep because I am so resentful about this situation and I feel like I absolutely hate him at the moment. Our relationship before was very equal - he's always done his fair share around the house for example so I didn't see this coming.
I have told him he doesn't take enough responsibility and it hasn't really changed much so I'm not sure what else I can do. Is this normal? Does it take longer for men to take on a full parenting role?
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Am I expecting too much?
TeaIsTheCure · 15/05/2017 03:50
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