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Married but I really like a work colleague..

(12 Posts)
user1494806102 Mon 15-May-17 01:56:34

Hi.

TLDR.. How do you stop having feelings for someone else you are not going to flirt, spend your life with or cheat with?

I just want these stupid feelings for her to end..

perplexed89 Mon 15-May-17 02:03:21

Hey user149,
I am ( may be i should start saying- was) in the same boat. Seems like workplace attraction is very common. Since i dont want to act on this crush of mine, I am going to ignore him and speak only when i really need to speak. No meetings outside of work and no personal talks at all.

Hope you ( and even I) overcome these emotions soon.

user1494806102 Mon 15-May-17 02:06:40

How are you suppose to ignore someone who works in the same workplace? No offense.

user1494806102 Mon 15-May-17 02:07:44

Sorry speak only when you need to, I get you. Still, just being around said person is awkward bacause of said feelings.

perplexed89 Mon 15-May-17 02:09:30

I would just divert my attention and immerse myself in work. Hang out with other friends. I dont have an answer but i will try to keep it strictly professional from tomorrow.

perplexed89 Mon 15-May-17 02:11:00

I feel you. I know i am not being helpful but this is what i have been hearing on the forum.

user1494806102 Mon 15-May-17 02:12:06

You're like me then. Just focus on work and not let it get to you, easy said then done right.

perplexed89 Mon 15-May-17 02:13:31

All the best. Let me know if you find something really helpful smile

user1494806102 Mon 15-May-17 02:17:14

Thank you.

sugarbeep9 Sat 20-May-17 07:44:35

develop a crush on someone else instead. like a celeb or your partner.
everytime you think of him pinch yourself.
imagine him doing things like farting pooping or picking his nose.
avoid him. don't hang around places you might see him. eg if you know he will be in the kitchen at x time don't go there. if you can sit in a way without seeing him do so, choose seating where you can't see him.
dont lust or fantasize of him.
keep busy and immerse yourself in a new hobby or project.
tell someone in real life! confession kills crushes 9 out of 10 times.

Changedname3456 Sat 20-May-17 13:30:43

Just keep thinking how badly your job prospects, let alone your married life, will suffer if you make your feelings known and she runs to HR! That ought to do it.

That and imagine her snoring or farting or picking her nose (or whatever else would thoroughly turn you off). She's going to have a mix of all the same faults, bad habits and smelly body parts as any other person. You just haven't seen them at work which is why you're able to project.

LallanasInPyjamas Sat 20-May-17 15:32:43

Are you male/female and are you married to a man or a woman?

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