Talk

Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Have I over reacted?

(6 Posts)
yellowbroccoli Sat 13-May-17 18:05:44

Me and my DH were arguing after I asked if he could clean up while I cooked dinner. He said no as I had been out today and it would be nice for me to do it, i said I have work tonight etc and I was cooking dinner anyway, argue went out of control and he shouted 'you're a cunt' at me which our child heard.
I went ballistic said how dare you use that word to me and told him to leave.
He has never said that to me before in my life!
He's currently gone but I have work later no one to have the kids. I'm trying to juggle everything with an added infection, I just complete saw red.
Have I cut off my nose to spite my face?

pog100 Sat 13-May-17 18:07:45

No. At the very least you need to set very clear boundaries, which you have.

WatchingFromTheWings Sat 13-May-17 18:19:52

You've not over reacted at all. He was bang out of order.

Joysmum Sat 13-May-17 18:28:02

So he's been out, was he working?

You're working later and was already working cooking dinner so not doing nothing what was he doing? What would he be doing tonight?

Whatever the answers are, if you're both the types who don't use that word and see it as one of the worst then he shouldn't use it, and certainly not within earshot of your child.

yellowbroccoli Sat 13-May-17 19:30:23

Well the good news is I can go to work tonight. He came home a while after, full of apologies tail between his legs. Knows he was out of order.
I personally don't like the word, if others choose to use it that's fine but I won't have it used to me in that manor. I think I also saw red because around the children is a big no no to me. It's disrespectful and I don't want them growing up thinking it's okay to use words like that and treat others like that.
As far as I'm concerned it's been put to bed now, but it sets a precedent for the future that I will not be treated like that in my own home. DH knows this and know there are other ways to get your point across than resorting to things like that. It was very much out of character for him and I think he shocked himself to, with how he snapped.

Aquamarine1029 Sat 13-May-17 20:22:38

I think it's clear that your husband feels terrible and knows full well what he did was unacceptable. I think a calm talk is in order to assure him that you want the two of you to be able to communicate before things turn into a war zone. Forgive him and move on.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now