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Is this just too awkward to date him?

(21 Posts)
WhippinPiccadilly1 Thu 11-May-17 12:49:28

Met a guy through OLD. Very compatible, both really keen on each other. He ticks all my boxes, and I find him extremely attractive both physically and intellectually.

There's a hitch, of course.

He's been single 5 months, after a 2 year relationship. In the last 5 weeks, he joined OLD and has been on 3 dates, including me.

I work in health care, in a close knit environment. My friends are also my colleagues. I have lots of close friends through work.

So imagine my horror, when I found out that one of the dates he had been on was my colleague and close friend (A). In fact, this friends 18 year old is considering doing some babysitting for me, to give you an idea of the friendship.

So I let things die out quickly, as it just felt too awkward for me. I spoke to A who said she didn't have a problem in me dating him, he was a really nice guy, but she just didn't fancy him (he most definitely isn't her type, so that all rings true). But I left it anyway. 2 weeks later, I thought better of it, and messaged him. We went on a date, and the sparks flew. Date 2 is this weekend.

Then today, I asked him out of curiosity (because we were laughing over the irony that pretty much everyone in work knows who he is and everything about him, Asia appears my friend told an awful lot of people about their date!). Yeah. You guessed. I know her too (C). She's the friend of B another close work colleague and infact, my A and B are currently away together on holiday. A holiday I was hoping to go on too.
A, and C will both be at an event at B's house in a few weeks, which I will also be at.

So, given the above, is it too awkward? I really like him, but I just feel a bit weird about it.

You couldn't make this shit up! And no, I don't live in a small town!!! The opposite!

WhippinPiccadilly1 Thu 11-May-17 12:51:00

Sorry, loads of typos in there. Hope it makes some sense at least!

TheNaze73 Thu 11-May-17 12:55:42

I'd always put friends first & if neither of them have a problem with it, you shouldn't either

WonderMike Thu 11-May-17 12:55:59

I take it he has a thing about nurses? grin

WhippinPiccadilly1 Thu 11-May-17 12:59:39

None of us are nurses, but close to it! C isn't in health care though!

None seem to have a problem. But they might say that because it seems the nicer thing to say?!

WonderMike Thu 11-May-17 13:05:13

It's nicer than saying "no, I thought he was really boring/ugly/smelly/judgemental" or whatever.

If the dates were just a quick drink, that's very different prospect to a 5 hour candlelight 17 course meal followed by a 7 hour sex session. If there was no spark, you really shouldn't overthink it, it's just a OLD thing that you end up meeting people on a date who you might not have dated if you'd met them first.

lookatmenow Thu 11-May-17 13:07:59

Even if it is the nicer thing to say, they've said it. They have realised that there is no realtionship going to blossom between him and them and as adults you move on.

Enjoy your date smile

nachogazpacho Thu 11-May-17 13:36:47

Just crack on. If they're not interested they won't care.

Ladyformation Thu 11-May-17 16:00:59

Agree with everyone else, crack on!

josuk Thu 11-May-17 16:07:34

You like him. You two have chemistry.
And he went on brief dates with them. Which none of them followed up on.
Not at all like you are dating a ex of a good friend!!!!

Flyinggeese Thu 11-May-17 16:09:15

I got completely lost with the lettering system but sounds like you're the only one with chemistry with this guy, and the other dates were just that, not relationships. I'd absolutely carry on. That combination of fancying someone both physically intellectually is too good to pass up for this.

ZaZathecat Thu 11-May-17 16:27:06

If it was just a date in each case I can't see what the problem is.

springydaffs Thu 11-May-17 16:32:09

I really don't see the problem at all, in any way, no matter which angle I look at it. Neither of them is interested so go ahead.

emilybrontescorset Thu 11-May-17 16:36:03

I don't see a problem either. Before I met dp I went on lots of dates. There wasnt anything wrong with any of them, they just weren't for me.

Dozer Thu 11-May-17 16:39:12

Not awkward at all: you're overthinking it.

Going on one date through OLD is nothing: it's not like he's someone's ex H!

DonkeysDontRideBicycles Thu 11-May-17 16:48:10

I must be in the minority, yes I would feel uncomfortable but none of your friends says he is a weirdo do they. In your shoes I would probably get over it if we socialised with the friends in question and he kept his focus on me.
If there is sufficient chemistry happening already I don't think you will question this for long.

HidingFromDD Thu 11-May-17 21:04:05

Wouldn't have a problem if they'd only been on one date. In
OLD the first date isn't really a date, it's a meeting to see whether this is a person you want to date.

AlternativeTentacle Fri 12-May-17 07:52:32

What did you ask him out of curiosity?

Aquamarine1029 Fri 12-May-17 20:18:25

I think you should absolutely date him. All this business with your friends is just a silly, funny story. If your friends don't mind, you shouldn't either. It's not as though they had a serious relationship with him. Just laugh about it and carry on.

SteCeety Fri 12-May-17 20:21:54

He dated your friend and they obvs didn't click. Carry on dating. It's not like it's your friends ex who she dearly loved. Now that would be out of order.
Go for it.

Nocarbsorsugar Fri 12-May-17 20:53:25

Birds of a feather flock together. I think it's probably a good sign.

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