OK, I really need some advice here as im not sure whats wrong with me. Ive name changed as I don't want anyone to recognise me. Ill also try not to drip feed.
Ive been with DP for 8 years. We have a lovely relationship, get on well, don't argue much and raise our 5 year old DS great. We agree on things like money , morals , how we raise DS and to family and friends we look happy.
Nearly 1 year ago we got engaged and we threw ourselves into the wedding plans. So far so good...
Then the end of March , Like a switch (which I desperately didn't want to click) I started to feel different... im not sure I want to get married or be with him at all. He is loyal and caring, hardworking and respectful but there's no spark... at all. I was in love with him for years (felt really lucky to have him) and that was enough and all of a sudden its like a flame has literally been blown out. He has never been in love with me in the way I wanted ( ive no doubt he loves me) . He isn't the cuddly type and doesn't say much where as im quite the other way but I know he would be a wonderful husband.
I cant work out if im having some kind of mid life crisis (im 34 btw) whether its some sort of weird pre wedding jitters or if the engagement has made me realise that as much as we get on we aren't right to marry each other???? Im so confused. I don't want to ruin my sons life by asking his dad to move out if 3 months down the line that switch just flies back on and I want him back again and its too late.
For those of you that are married, what type of feelings does your marriage consist of? Are you still "in love" or is it more of a friendship? Am I thinking of throwing something good away because ive got bored? I just don't know. As I said im 34 and surely the spark is still supposed to be there before you marry or after 8 years is this normal?
Before someone asks, this is nothing to do with another man, my head hasn't been turned or anything like that.
Any advice would be appreciated as this is really eating me up. He is a wonderful man, my son is very happy and DP gives us a lovely life, these feelings are very new. Im so confused...
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
To say " I Do" ???
Confused1983 · 09/05/2017 14:58
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