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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

Am I being lightly stalked or is it just me

33 replies

RalphMalph · 30/04/2017 01:54

Lately I've had a few withheld number calls. Thought its just PPI stuff so ignored. But I recently received calls starting at 2pm and repeating nearly every hour until 10pm when I thought it can't be PPI. On answering I heard someone breath then nothing. I waited a minute then I hung up.
So to cut a story short I had a text/phone relationship for a year then a few nice dates on the last one she turned a bit odd and a day later I was told to leave her alone, so I did. This was about 9 months ago I thought nothing of it but my family said I bet its her (there is a fair bit to her). I hadn't really thought it but I had a quick look using a friends social media and found she recently set her social media pic to a characterised portrait that I drew of her.
Maybe its purely coincidental but the phone call was a bit surprising. Do women actually do this sort of stuff after so long?

OP posts:

Report

Thinkingofausername1 · 30/04/2017 05:39

Block it

SiouxieQ · 30/04/2017 05:45

Do women actually do this sort of stuff after so long?

No.
Just add it to your blocked list, job done.

smashyourglasses · 30/04/2017 05:46

It's just you.

Iris65 · 30/04/2017 06:00

Ill ones do.

TheMonkeyandthePlywoodViolin · 30/04/2017 06:04

No way can you assume its her.

I get all sorts of weird spammy calls every day.

pinkblink · 30/04/2017 06:27

How do you block a withheld number?

PossumInAPearTree · 30/04/2017 06:53

Get a bt call Guardian phone. It won't allow withheld numbers through unless they press something. Then you'll know if it's a call centre or not because the automated ones anyway don't do it. If it's her it may put her off.

TheNaze73 · 30/04/2017 07:00

They do OP. Just block her

scaryclown · 30/04/2017 07:09

Well if it's any help, i have some thoughts...

I've been on a dialler for some ppi or 'car accident' on where there is a few seconds of silence/muffled breathing then a hang-up.. this is usually to get you to call back though, so there's usually a number
Something about the weather and spring brings back exes and might-have-beens. I am dreaming about a few now, and I've had some others message me on Fb..
If you are looking at her profile, then you'll be higher on her 'other people you might know' feed..And so she might think you are stalking her..
DNE (Do not engage) works most effectively with both PPI bots (that measure when you reply and go 'oh, so it IS a real number' and with stalkers...

Hellobye · 30/04/2017 07:12

I find PPI numbers do that if you don't say anything when you answer.

scaryclown · 30/04/2017 07:12

Also if she said leave her alone and you did, its one of those 'not necessarily ended, kind of still in stand-off' things where she's waiting for you to say 'for ever?' and she might think you are waiting for her to say 'i didn't mean it to be for ever' ..

Silvercatowner · 30/04/2017 07:21

You can't block withheld numbers. I don't pick up any 'withheld number' call apart from calls from my surgery/the hospital when I am expecting them.

booksandhearts · 30/04/2017 07:26

On my phone you can go on your settings and block them, but it will block all withheld numbers which sometimes can be important

TheMonkeyandthePlywoodViolin · 30/04/2017 07:56

3. If you are looking at her profile, then you'll be higher on her 'other people you might know' feed..And so she might think you are stalking her..

This is a myth

Walkacrossthesand · 30/04/2017 09:40

Is it, monkey? I thought that one of the reasons people I vaguely knew (eg through my last job but not colleagues) but wasnt FB friends with, would suddenly pop up in my 'people you may know' feed. Otherwise it's just plain creepy - how would FB know I had any connection with them if it wasn't because they'd looked me up?

TheMonkeyandthePlywoodViolin · 30/04/2017 09:53

It sis.

For example, patients at work keep coming up on mine because we both have my work number on phone, or because our location has been same.

I really hate the fact this widespread myth probably means they see me on theirs and think i must have been looking them up when i havent

TheMonkeyandthePlywoodViolin · 30/04/2017 09:54

And theyve not been looking me up either..its been on a day they have been at my work and i haven't, or even people i have never met.

Huskylover1 · 30/04/2017 10:24

I used to work in a call centre. The Outward telephone system will dial 4 numbers at once, for each staff member it has working. This is on the basis that usually 1 out of 4 numbers will get picked up. The first call to get picked up will connect to an operator, the other 3 then get disconnected. This results in 1-3 people picking up and there being no caller on the end of the line. BUT...those 3 calls are thrown back in to the "customers to call" system, and probably scheduled for the next day, not to call repeatedly all day....it really depends on how the Call Centre have configured their phone system.

Regards FB and showing "people you may know", this is definitely NOT based on who has been looking you up. It's based on e-mail addresses you may have, post codes you have visited and post codes where you have lived. And also friends of friends and shared friends. I have loads of my customers pop up as people I might know. There is no way they have looked me up. It's because I have e-mailed them and FB knows this.

WellErrr · 30/04/2017 10:28

Yes. Women are all crazy psycho bitches who just love to ring up randomers from months ago who were told to stay away from them.

purplechoc · 30/04/2017 11:10

When you get another call like it and notice it's the breathing, just put the phone on the side without hanging up and walk off and get on with what you were doing. They'll soon get bored if it is someone being weird!

scaryclown · 30/04/2017 12:25

It's NOT a myth re people you may know. Interactions feed into the algorithm.

TheMonkeyandthePlywoodViolin · 30/04/2017 12:46

It is. Capitalising IS NOT doesnt make you right

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TheMonkeyandthePlywoodViolin · 30/04/2017 12:46

If you search someone they will appear in YOUR people you may know but it wont make you appear in theirs

Gingernaut · 30/04/2017 12:49

You can block all witheld numbers.

The problem then comes when someone tries to call you through a switchboard.

LoveforPGTipsMonkey · 30/04/2017 12:54

haha, Monkey!

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