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Separation anxiety after cheating DH. Having a breakdown

(6 Posts)
PinkTeletubby101 Sat 29-Apr-17 16:53:25

Please help. I've posted a few times in the past but it's all come to a head yesterday. He's fucking vile. Our 9 year anniversary tomorrow. What did he do yesterday ? Dropped OW home from work (fuck knows what happened) who he SWORE ON OUR SONS LIVES LAST WEEK he wasn't speak to her anymore and hasn't done since Christmas. Once again my gut was right. He's been staying over at work to speak to her. I fuckin hate him for what he's doing
To me and leaving our 2 boys. I hate her. And him. I told him to pack his stuff yesterday and said he's having minimal contact with our DS's (mean but I'm currently heartbroken). He said was their anything he could do to make things better - I said hand in your notice Tuesday. He probably won't. He earns 30k and I earn 8. We are both 25 years old and I'm sick of the cheating lying scum bag. Yet why do I pine for him so bad, wishing we could make it right and I'm absolutely suffering/miserable on my own. When it's just me and DC's I don't know what to do. I actually don't know what to do with myself, I have no hobbies and sit here all day crying about being on own and his lack of emotion. It's
Clear he doesn't love me any more - that's life - so why do I feel like killing myself and how do I stop hating being on my own? Since 15 years old we have never had more than 2 nights apart (apart from the odd few holidays with friends for max a week). I fucking hate him so much for this but he's now in angry mode , treating me like shit WHEN HES FUCKING DONE THIS!!!!!!!!

PinkTeletubby101 Sat 29-Apr-17 16:54:01

We was on holiday together last week in the Easter holidays, supposed to be going abroad in 6 weeks. JUST FUCKING WHY

Doubtfuldaphne Sat 29-Apr-17 17:05:47

Phone the Samaritans OP. Or do you have any family / friends close by you can talk to? I understand the massive rage and the loneliness and just wanting everything to go back to how it was.
I promise one day you'll look back on this and it won't be so painful.

PinkTeletubby101 Sat 29-Apr-17 17:19:18

It's awful.
I hate my life so much and I shouldn't because of my sons. We were just alone in the car together - I said "how we ever gna sort this out" and he shouted IM GNA LEAVE MY FUCKING JOB ARENT I and I said ok well I'll show you the messages I sent her earlier so you can get your story straight for Tuesday. He got out the car and he's stormed off n turned his phone off. Hate this

Chillyegg Sat 29-Apr-17 17:26:23

Oh op..hugs flowers

NoFuckingRoomOnMyBroom Sat 29-Apr-17 18:06:13

There's nothing to sort my lovely, it doesn't matter if he leaves his job. He has zero respect for you, if he didhe would have done everything in his power to make this right in the first place, instead he's staying behind at work to see her & dropping her off at home-wtf? hmm
You don't need him, please get out of that minset. You can & will be fine without him, your world does not revolve around him.
Tell him to fuck off, you'll be so much better without him.

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